Crying wolf -- or, seeking attention

"The Boy Who Cried Wolf"

 

There's a story many parents tell their children, typically called, "The Boy Who Cried Wolf." (It's an Aesop's Fable actually) It's about a little boy who's watching a flock of sheep and thinks it's funny to yell out that there's a wolf, so the whole village rushes up to fight a wolf ... except, the boy was playing a joke and there's no wolf. Angry, the villagers go back home. Well, the boy does it again, and laughs at the upset villagers. Finally, a wolf does show up and the boy screams that there's a wolf, but this time the villagers ignore his calls because they don't want to be made fools again. So, the wolf eats the whole flock of sheep. You see, had the boy not tricked the villagers then they would have believed his sincere cry for help. Moral of the lesson: cry for help too much and when you really need it nobody will listen.

 

Children aren't the only ones guilty of this behavior, because adults do it all the time. It's sometimes called "attention seeking behavior." I'm not sure that's entirely fair though. We can get used to too much help, to the point where we don't like doing anything alone. But, it's probably fair to say adults know better and still do it. I will say this, it's really irritating to the people helping. People like to help, they really do, but don't test their generosity too far and you'll quickly find out how true the story of the boy and the wolf really is.

 

Given all that, when should we ask for help? When we are at the end of all our options, our fingers worked to the bone, and we can't see any other way out? No. Ask for help whenever you actually need it. Don't fear asking for help. If you need it, then ask. And, be grateful for the help. Most people are glad to help when asked kindly. Who knows where it might lead? You may even find a friend for life.

 

- M

End of the year review

So, how did you do this year?
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At the beginning of the year, we make resolutions about what we'll accomplish and so on. But, do we sit down at the end of the year and figure out if we actually did anything on our list? Nope. I'm just as guilty of this as anyone. I think it's kind of depressing to see how optimistic we are at the start of the year, just to be slapped in the face by reality at the end. So, it's easier to ignore it all and go on my merry way.

 

Of course, this begs the question of why we make resolutions in the first place? I doubt we make them in spite of ourselves, since I believe we really do mean to get things done, yet we also are somewhat aware that we are probably kidding ourselves. We pledge to lose weight, become wealthy, inspire the world, and bring peace to everyone. There are all kinds of promises we make. The most important ones are the ones we have control over, and still life gets in the way and we find ourselves failing to meet our own expectations.

 

So, am I suggesting that we stop making promises to ourselves? Nope, not at all. I think we need the optimism in our lives. We need to be reaching for better, and striving for more than who we are currently. We realize that self-improvement is something we should do, so we make resolutions to make that happen. So what if we don't accomplish them all? At least we tried. It's better to try and fail than fail to try. Hmm, that's pretty good ... I wonder if anyone said that before?

 

- M

Merry Christmas!

May we all remember the reason for the season. And, may peace be with you.

 

Merry Christmas!

 

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Fun in the snow

Like many children, I remember making snow angels, snowball fights (not with icy snow though, that's mean), snow caves, snow forts, and simply diving into snow drifts. I lived where there was lots of snow and sorely miss it these days. My children did get an opportunity to experience a genuine white-out blizzard though--and I made sure they got out in it and remembered the experience. I think snow is beautiful and inspiring. It's pure magic for a kid.

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Of course, as you grow older, you find yourself driving in the snow and it's a lot less enjoyable. Well, many people think so, but I'm not one of them. I love driving in snow and ice, and have gotten pretty good at it. Deep snow isn't fun to walk through and it sure isn't fun to scoop out a driveway full of the stuff. But, it's all worthwhile when you look out your back windows and see a lawn of shining snow. Trees and shrubs look astounding with a nice coat of snow and ice. Something deep inside us marvels at simple beauty and we shouldn't turn aside when we experience it.

 

I talk a lot about recapturing the joys of childhood because we adults forget too easily. There's nothing wrong with sitting down and watching anthills, or listening to thunderstorms, or marveling at a shooting star. We lose the wonder, the joy, the thrill of discovery, and delirious fun of being alive. So, find some snow and jump in. Flail your arms, make a snow angel, and don't mind that you're getting wet. Have some fun!

 

- M

Human autopilot

There are times when we do things automatically, without thinking about what we're doing. Habit sometimes shows up that way. I've heard of people moving to a new house and when they drive home they find themselves at their old home. It's done without thought. I bet we've all done something similar. Habit can be an exceptionally tough thing to break.

 

Some skills are actually exercises in automatic behavior--for instance: assembly line work, typing, public speaking, billiards, juggling, and on to an infinite variety. Right now, I'm dazzled by piano players and the way their hands work independently of each other to create incredible music. I'm learning to play and am pleasantly surprised to find out it's very similar to typing--which I'm great at. Drumming is another skill that bewilders me, because good drummers can keep multiple beats going without flaw while still twisting in flairs and surprises--it's like their arms are alien creatures with life all their own.

 

Of course, going on automatic pilot can cause problems. There are times we totally drift away, daydreaming while our bodies do their own thing. You can easily drop out and find yourself an hour down the road and not remember any of it. That can be dangerous, so consider that a friendly warning. And then there's my personal favorite automatic activity ... daydreaming! Yup, I've lost dozens of hours happily floating along on my own imagination. I highly recommend it.

 

- M

Star Wars-Rogue One movie review (no spoilers here)

 

My son and I went to see the new Star Wars movie, "Rogue One." I love Star Wars, particularly the original trilogy. This movie, if you didn't know, is about how the rebels get the plans for the Death Star (the planet busing movie from the original Star Wars--now known as "Episode IV, A New Hope"). This movie nicely slots in right before it, providing a welcome new world to rampage around in. "Rogue One" is loads of fun! I loved it.

 

I'm sure some people will look for, and find, plot problems and nitpicks. But, the movie focuses on story and creates deeply provoking characters. Yes, there are call outs to well-known characters (mainly simple cameos), but this movie is all about new people. The actors clearly were having a good time and there's plenty of chemistry between them. This is a story about courage and sacrifice for the greater good. I'm all for more stories like it.

 

"Rogue One" breaks Star Wars tradition in a lot of ways, but the most surprising was that it doesn't feature a title crawl spelling out the story. Yippee! We dive straight in to the action. We are with the main character the entire movie, and get to know her hopes and pains very well. Darth Vader is back in his true role--the big and nasty muscle of the Empire--though I'm not quite sure what to think of him. As we have time to process, I hope to find people like the portrayal.

 

The movie ends as it must. However, if you think you know what happens because you know Princess Leia has the Death Star plans at the end ... well, you've watched Star Wars before. This movie is about how it happens, and it's a terrific ride. I'm glad that piece was added to the puzzle. It's a good story that deserved to be told. I can't give a better compliment as a writer.

 

- M

Sharing is caring ... but, but, but it's mine!

One of the first lessons we learn as kids is to share. I admit it's a bit of a strange concept, even for adults. We work hard to earn something and then are expected to share it without recompense? But, it's mine! Yeah, tough thing to do. Despite the fact that much of our lives is given willingly and openly. For some reason, sharing our toys is almost going too far.

 

There's a scene in the recent movie, "Guardians of the Galaxy" where the main hero--StarLord--has finally recovered his music device (a Sony Walkman cassette tape player), which is his only link to his dead mother. Another hero asks why it was so important, and StarLord hands over the device without a second thought or worry. It's immensely valuable to him, and he has no problem sharing it. Wow, that's a surprising example to see. The last time I did that, I got my book back with water damage--grrrr.

 

Possession is a funny concept actually. Who is doing the possessing? When we have trouble sharing, then I think there's a good argument toward either side being the possessor. We have a word for people who don't share--selfish. Sure, it's used in a harmful way at times, but for the most part we understand the need to share what we have. If we hold onto things too tightly, they rule our lives and we are no longer free. By sharing we actually free ourselves from a sort of prison. It's a neat concept, and we know it's so valuable that we teach our children from the beginning about it.

 

Who could have guessed parents were so smart? Amazing!

 

- M

Spending time with your honey.

Sorry about the late blog post, but yesterday I spent all evening watching movies with my sweetheart and I wasn't about to interrupt that time for anything. In our busy world, it's far too easy to let time slip away and not spend it with the people who matter most in your life. We go to work, do our jobs, then come home and growl at anyone around and then go to sleep (well, maybe that's just me ... on a bad day). Hopefully I've learned to do better.

 

No matter if it's a formal date, a spontaneous outing, or simple time alone, being with your special lady (or man) is worth a thousand regular days. I personally enjoy a good mix of planned and unplanned. However you manage it, you'll build memories to last a lifetime. Such connections are impossible to replace, yet are built with tiny strands of shimmering moments. It's a delicate and fragile process, easy to interrupt and hard to produce.

 

 

Let our your hopelessly romantic side and really treat your loved ones with special attention. Turn off your cell phone, put aside your tablet, switch off the television and spend time together. It doesn't have to cost a nickel and I bet you'll enjoy it too. It's actually a funny thing how we need reminding to do what we already want to do.

 

Well, what are you waiting for? Go spend time with your beloved!

 

- M

Ideas come from ... well, it's magic.

A cast of an anthill. Wow!

Have you ever asked an artist where they get their ideas? Likely a comedian will tell you it's from life. An artist might say their dreams. A musician perhaps will mention a particularly emotional time. A writer will smile and say, yes. You see, it's all of these things and more. Creative people are constantly sifting through their experiences and holding onto little nuggets they find interesting. It's like a little boy picking through stones at the side of a road. There are jewels to find, even if nobody else sees them. Imagination doesn't get bogged down by specifics or practicality. When something is fascinating, that's all it needs to be.

 

In Greek times they called inspiration a gift of the gods (specifically the Muses) and felt it was supernaturally gifted. I'll agree it sure feels like that when inspiration pounds you flat with awe, though most times it's a willful act of searching for something you like. Think of listening to music. Do you always listen to the same thing? If you have a large music library, you probably skip through quite a few until you settle down and let it play. Ideas are like that.

 

My favorite answer is to say I get ideas from clouds and then walk away. Best to give somebody a thing to ponder rather than shrug and say, "No clue. Why? Do you have an idea for me?"

 

What's the real issue is what you do with an idea. Is it worthy of putting effort into it, or is it only a puff of wind on your cheek? What could blossom from your work? And, if successful, how many people will be delighted? Ideas don't even have to be grand and profitable. Try out a few that have no more impact than a paper airplane gliding to the end of your living room. Ideas are magic, and so are you.

 

- M

Remembering the costs of freedom

December 7th is an introspective date here in America. We look back on when our country was attacked without provocation or declaration of war. A sneak attack. Many people died that day and drew our nation into another great war. It's a day to honor veterans, think about current state of affairs, and pray for our military.

 

It's been said that peace comes at the point of a sword. I pray and hope it doesn't come to that again. War is unkind to all involved. May we remember and pledge our strength to peace.

 

In honor of those fallen.

We remember Pearl Harbor.

USS Arizona memorial

Massive animals are fun

As a boy, I loved dinosaurs--as most boys tend to. What's not to love? Huge creatures. Terribly scary. Ancient. Extinct. Plus, all we have is bones (and a few rock impressions of bodies) to tell us what these things looked like. So, it gave me free reign to create dinosaurs my own way. I made them gigantic. The only trouble was, it's difficult to really imagine the scale of such animals. Sure, it's simple to think of a great building and picture that. But, when was the last time you saw a building walk?

 

A couple of recent movies depicted enormous creatures--Godzilla and Pacific Rim. But, it's like looking at pictures in a book. There's so little sense of true scale. A favorite game of mine (EVE Online) has ships so huge they'd make the Death Star look puny. In the game, players progress from tiny vessels with a single occupant into ships with millions. Yet, regardless of the increasing scale, the size visually is the same (a game design decision, otherwise how could you possibly see what's going on if the ship is your entire world?). This is one area that 3-D visualization is well suited to illustrate. Without a sense of depth, it's just an image.

Kong: Skull Island
an upcoming movie about a really big ape

There are times when the scale really comes into focus. There's a game, Shadow of the Colossus, where you fight monsters so huge that you climb on them (and the final boss is practically city-sized). Maybe it's because you interact closely with these colossi, but the scale feels incredibly real. When the magic of perspective is fully revealed, it grants breathtaking vision. And, when you witness giant monsters wandering around, there's a special joy that isn't matched by anything smaller.

 

- M

The incredible heights of joy

Joy is often times an overwhelming emotion. People will cry and howl and fall to their knees due to incredible joy. Joyful relief is especially strong, as it's a catharsis for bottled-up emotions. I've noticed that within the bounds of a story, true joy is particularly difficult to create. I think back on my youth and the scene from the original Star Wars, where Luke destroys the Death Star. The entire story builds up to it, and I was very happy for the characters. Yet, my joy was in seeing the bad guys lose and the good guys come together in victory. Yes, overwhelming joy. Had I been in theaters at the time, I'm sure they were whooping and hollering and clapping each other on the backs.

 

In life, we can easily get caught up in finding joy over any other thing. People waste vast fortunes in pursuit of pleasure, others spend huge chunks of time doing things that only provide joy for a moment before blowing away. Because of this, stories provide a great opportunity to seek joy in a safe environment--after all, the story won't come through the pages and slap you for getting it wrong will it? One of my favorite joyful moments comes from the Heinlein book, "Have Spacesuit, Will Travel." When the hero of the story (a boy who fixed up a used spacesuit and goes on adventures) finally gains his courage and fights to succeed, I was practically dancing in my room. I loved that moment, and actually closed the book to treasure it--I finished the book the next day.

 

Our emotions do define us, just as much as our logic defines us. They can't be removed without tearing apart who we are. It's why we love roller coasters, complicated puzzles, romances, and mysteries. We thrill at having our emotions jostled and sprung. Stories are emotional hurricanes. The funny thing is, we know what we're getting into with a story, because there's always a tease about what the story is about.

 

Joy is the emotion we likely crave the most. We want a happy ending. We want to feel good afterwards. We hope everything turns out, and when it does we still find ourselves elated. Treat yourself to a good story, and find a bit of joy today!

 

- M

Wisdom teeth ... makes wise?

I've been told that wisdom teeth are so named because it shows the person is now old enough to be wise. Erm, no. For me, I'm blessed with a small mouth and giant teeth, so I had mine taken out pretty early. I've heard that some people manage to keep them and are then apparently quite wise. Should the story include a penalty for having the wisdom teeth pulled out? Hmm, that would make for a better urban legend, I think.

 

Trouble is, getting teeth pulled hurts. A lot. And, getting four monster molars pulled at the same time is a prescription for agony. We all have ways of dealing with pain, but pain in your mouth is one of the worst kinds. You can't get away from it. It's not like you can stop moving your jaw for long periods. My trouble is that my tongue seems to have a life of its own, and the silly thing keeps probing at places it shouldn't. Result? Ouch.

 

Maybe wisdom teeth do make you wise after all? You learn quite a lot about pain and managing discomfort. Those are definitely worthwhile lessons. And, life serves up quite a few painful teaching moments, that's for sure. I just wish we didn't have to go through the pains first. But, I'd bet we wouldn't learn anything if it didn't hurt when we did wrong. There's another life lesson.

 

Wow, wisdom teeth do make you smerter!

 

- M

Mirror, mirror, on the wall...

When you first read the story of Snow White, did you ever wonder what the mirror would say if you asked the question yourself? I've never considered myself beautiful--naturally, since I'm a man--yet, I always wanted to have the aspect of beauty. It seems like these days we hear so much about self image, self-love, and all about self. But, beauty isn't about any of that. Real beauty is generous and humble, kind and forgiving, loving and confident. Yes, beauty is far more than outward appearance.

 

Funny thing is, in the story the gorgeous (and evil) queen gets destroyed in the end. Sure, the story has a moral--it's a kid's story after all. Beauty is fleeting, like flowers blooming in a field. Even so, beauty is wonderful to behold. We naturally treasure beautiful things, create beautiful art, and love beautiful music. We are created to appreciate beauty.

 

So, why do we get so preoccupied with it? Why do we ignore the incredible beauty all around us? I suppose it's also in our nature to be blind to it. Funny that. I'm not the first to point out these things, and I have no doubt there will be plenty more books confronting the subject. In the end, we need to satisfy our longings with confidence and quiet assurance. If we chase the wind, we catch nothing. Take a breath and enjoy the beauty all around you. Stop and watch the birds, count the clouds, and listen to the trees. You'll find your confidence growing, I promise.

 

- M

The heavy weight of loss

It's a neat trick when a story causes the audience to feel the burdens of loss. Perhaps because a seriously bad event happened, something treasured was destroyed, or a beloved character died. Whatever the reason, the feeling of loss is powerful. Ever since we lost our first toy, we've been taught the agony of loss. It comes in a myriad of forms, yet it's always new agony. Perhaps we feel loss in a deeper way than other emotions? I don't know, but grief is a form of loss and when someone is grieving, all I want to do is take the pain away.

"Angel of Grief" by American sculptor, art critic and poet William Wetmore Story (1819-1895).

Of course, stories are either fiction or happened in the past. So, we know the losses we feel are not our own, though many times they sure feel real. We can turn off the television, or close the book, and return to reality. I believe that's one very big reason why stories are always desired. We can run through all human emotions within the safe confines of a story, then turn away and go on with our lives. It's escapism, happy relief, and fantasy.

 

So, if a story captures our interests so thoroughly that we feel a sense of loss, then that story was a good one. Connections are what binds us together, even connections to imagination. I never tire of sharing stories with friends, talking about things we did or read or watched. Common stories increase the bonds. Have you ever wanted a parent or uncle to tell an old much-heard story again? Why do we do that? Because we enjoy the emotions that come from it. It's like reliving the adventures all over, one more time. And, with the telling, a new generation of listeners enjoy the new connections.

 

- M

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving!

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Please enjoy the potatoes and stuffed ham! But, turkey isn't as tasty as people think. Try the dressing and jams instead!

Long distance travel

It was marvelous having my parents come over for the weekend. 15 hour drive. Ouch. And, yet, long-distance travel is a great business. We can wish for faster transport, but for now at least it's either car, plane, bus, or boat. If you're going a long way, then it'll take some time. And, we travel for fun and love and business. People travel all over the world, then turn around and do it again. Where are those teleporters we were promised?

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When we finally get into space colonization, it'll make trips around the world seem like going to the market for groceries. It's nearly impossible to comprehend the vast distances involved. Trips will take months and years. How far will we go? Can we make it to another star? Another galaxy? It's fun to think about.

 

What about travel underwater? Scuba diving doesn't offer much exploration of the vast oceans, and submarines don't have much of a view. Between space and underwater, I think my own romantic inclinations lean toward the water. Space is vast, yet empty. The depths are full of life, some yet to be discovered and others bewilderingly alien. Wouldn't it be amazing to be the first to see new life?

 

And, all that from simply traveling somewhere. Incredible.

 

- M

Animals in stories

Ever since "Watership Down" changed the way we see rabbits, and "Old Yeller" and "Cujo" made us doubt our family pets, animals have been important aspects of stories. Okay, I'm joking. Animals have been part of stories since human beings have been capable of talking. We love funny pets, curious creatures, and all sorts of animals. Some of the most popular YouTube videos are cat and dog videos. Yup, we love animals.

 

From an author's standpoint, having animals in stories allows for some really neat interplay and character development. We can determine a lot about a character simply by how they react to animals. Treat a stray cat nicely, and we know immediately that this person is trustworthy (not necessarily correct, but it leads us to the conclusion). Have a villain toss a bagged dog into a stream and it's either a horrid person or a very different culture than the one we grew up in (either way, it's doubtful the audience will trust the character).

 

Animals also reflect the people they are around, many times acquiring the personalities and mannerisms of their owners. Because of this trait, we can get funny little glimpses of hidden flaws and counter play between the animals and people. They also are capable of getting away with behaviors that a regular character simply couldn't accomplish. Animals are too cute to be ashamed. Unless it's a skunk, and those things shouldn't exist at all--(only kidding, I'm sure they have a good purpose).

 

- M

Singing in the shower

from "Ferris Bueller's Day Off"

Do you sing in the shower? Many people do. It's a great echo chamber, so your voice will sound much fuller and richer. Plus, you're in a place where you're virtually guaranteed to be alone. I love singing in the shower, or in the car, or in my room. Pity my vocal chords won't take the strain for long--no, I'm not awful, I just don't have a strong throat. Maybe I can strengthen them somehow, though I've never tried.

 

Like any kind of entertainment talent, if you're really good then you can find a tasty career using your ability. Or, you could simply entertain yourself, since there's no special rule that you must use it for other people. I'll even bet professionals sing in the shower. It's just a fun thing to do. Hopefully nobody catches you singing, and even worse ... dancing.

 

I think we naturally try out new things by ourselves. Most people I know dislike practicing in front of others. It's not because of nerves, I don't think, but more about being really terrible at the beginning. Music is especially that way, since we know what it's supposed to sound like and when we're the ones producing it, it's painfully obvious when the sounds aren't good. When my children were young, it was fun watching them learn basic skills. They didn't like being corrected, though eventually realized that teaching does involve pointing out mistakes and how to fix them. It's a blow to your pride to have your errors pointed out, so it's good to learn early that you have to swallow your pride to grow up.

 

See? All that came from singing in the shower. Go do it!

 

- M

Romance to last a lifetime

I really enjoy taking my wife out on dates. We talk and laugh and look in each other's eyes. There are many times when I feel we share each other's heartbeats, and breathe the same breaths. It's wondrous and surprising, bewildering and enchanting, magical and completely real. In her, I see all my dreams come true. Yes, miracles do happen--she agreed to marry me, and amazingly still appreciates my company. I can't imagine life without her. She's my soul-mate.

 

 

When I was a pining teenager, yearning for the tender kisses of love and finding them only in books and music, I comforted myself with the promise that someday my day would come. Funny thing is, I never saw it coming. Actually, when I met her, she fast became my ... best friend. There wasn't any romance in the relationship at all. We talked about everything and nothing at all. I wanted her insight and wisdom, and I revealed things to her I've never told anyone else. We got to know each other and I liked her a lot. I trusted her completely.

 

Sometime in the mix, friendship moved into something much deeper--love. I still can't place my finger on the exact time it happened. Actually, I'm not even sure I understood what romantic love was, but I was willing to take the risk with her. We prayed constantly and took it slow. She was much more eager, but never pushed me. Our friendship changed to love and deepened every day. Our love for each other is still maturing, each day. I can hardly imagine a richer love, yet I know in 25 more years it will be far beyond what I understand today.

 

Like I said, miracles do happen.

 

- M

Forced to do dumb things

People do dumb things all the time. In stories, however, when characters do ignorant, dumb, stupid things it rips the audience right out of the story and they collectively sit back and groan. A few examples from movies I've recently seen include: a cab driver still driving (and weaving wildly) after someone falls onto his roof and grabs on by sheer accident, cops shooting at a fleeing suspect while on a crowded street, cops shooting a suspect while the bad guy holds a baby hostage to his chest, security guards firing into a crowded boardroom to stop a loose animal, and the ever popular scared person investigating a noise without any weapon at hand. I could name the movies, but these choice moments are multiple offenders and are seen all over the story map.

 

You see, the problem with these dumb acts isn't so much that they're stupid and wrong. No, the problem is people simply wouldn't do them without very precise motivation underlying their actions. The writer wanted tension and so forced the characters to behave unnaturally. The audience will notice and will immediately pass beyond the story, criticizing it rather than enjoying it. It breaks the implicit trust the audience has made with the author. All of my examples could work fine, but only if the characterization had a good reason. Normal people would pull over (or slam on the brakes) if someone fell on their roof. Cops certainly wouldn't endanger innocent lives by firing wildly at a fleeing suspect (and, many times the suspect hasn't done anything worth dying for in the first place). When you're scared you won't blithely investigate suspicious sounds without arming yourself, unless you have no other choice.

 

Audiences are enjoying the story to escape reality for a time. That's the goal. It's basic escapism. Even history is a way of leaving the present behind and leaping through a time portal. They want to connect with the main characters. So, when the characters behave unrealistically it pulls them away and causes the audience to moan in frustration. The desired tension doesn't develop because the audience isn't connecting with the characters any more. The trust is lost, and it might take the rest of the story to get it back. Why lose it in the first place?

 

I often sit back and wonder, "Would <place name here> actually do this? Or am I forcing them to do something stupid?" If you have any doubt, then the answer is likely, "yes," and you need to do some re-writing. It's well worth the effort.

 

- M

Friends and Friendship

When I was a child, there was a saying I heard often, "If you want a friend, be a friend." The idea being that friendship starts with being friendly in the first place. It puts the onus on myself and not others. I need to initiate. Of course, if everyone is doing the same thing then it's easy to make friends. These days I see far too many people with scowls on their faces, clearly not interested in talking with anyone, and it's rather difficult to engage a sour attitude with friendliness. I still try though.

 

 

The glory of friends is you have someone to talk to who has expressed interest in you and hopefully wants to help you succeed in life. Moving to close friends and there you have someone actively wanting to help and who will be there for you in times of difficulty. Friends make life more rewarding. Personally, I have only a few close friends, though many general friends, because it's kind of hard to fully open up to anyone. Close friends know who you really are and still accept you.

 

To anyone struggling to make friends, I offer encouragement. Keep trying. Being friendly is a skill, and like any skill there are some who do it naturally and others who learn it through sheer hard work. You'll find someone, in this wide and wonderful world. Even total goofballs make friends. Cheer up, smile, and get out there. Don't give up, keep trying, and open your eyes. Sometimes all it takes is a happy face finding the eyes of a tormented soul, and if you let it, then a fast friendship can blossom.

 

- M

Medieval weapons ... romantic or brutally effective?

I collect swords because I find them beautiful and I enjoy slicing potatoes out of the air with them. Yup, I really do that. And, anyone who visits gets to do it too. It's kind of a thing we do at my house. I've also collected a few other items, like a battle axe, a mace, and a flail. One thing's become crystal clear regarding these weapons: these things are ruthlessly effective instruments of war. These things don't play around.

Castilian Sword from Museum Replicas

You've probably seen movies where the hero gets smacked in the face with a mace. What's not shown is how the hero wouldn't have a face left afterwards. For a long time I wouldn't display the flail (which is a spiked ball on a chain, attached to a long handle) because it's the single most brutal weapon I've ever seen. The thing is, when these weapons were created they weren't for play or beauty; this was warfare and not games. But, with the comfort of many intervening years, these items become less utilitarian and more curiosities.

 

I wonder if today's weapons will have the same fate? Will people many years from now look at our guns and tanks and think, "huh, I could put those on my wall." Maybe. There is something to learn though, and that's how incredible our concept of beauty is. Just think about. Technology is a sort of art. It follows that war technology would eventually fall into the same category. Catapults, once used to destroy castles, are now being used to throw pumpkins! (Punkin Chunkin') I think it's a testimony to the resilience of we human beings how we can turn what once took lives into something new that creates joy and pleasure. As a side note, there are two pumpkins on our porch that desperately require a few good slices to fit into the trash cans... hee hee.

 

- M

Movie review: Doctor Strange

"Doctor Strange" is the new Marvel movie and I loved it. One thing you should know before seeing it: this movie deals with other dimensions and head-trippy visuals. This is the first movie I've seen where I think seeing it in 3-D is worth the added depth, because it's useful and adds to the experience. Anyway, the story concerns an arrogant self-important neurosurgeon who has his whole world turned over. This movie brings the concept of magic to the Marvel universe (though, they actually spend a bit of time saying it's really just a different kind of perception and not hocus-pocus). Because of that setup, there is plenty of zipping around and time distortion and all kinds of monkey business.

 

The story is a fairly simple reluctant hero. There's the wise old teacher, embittered outcasts, helpful students, and plenty of tricks. I feel they didn't spend much time on the training scenes (mostly because what does it matter really) so they could get to the meat of the plot and let the bad guy do his thing. I'll admit I was honestly surprised at the method used to win, and was happy it made sense within it's own world building. With a story this weird, it's pleasant to see it following it's own rules.

 

Most important for a movie, this was fun! I had a blast. There weren't any times I wanted to break for the bathroom, or check how much popcorn was left. I was engaged throughout the whole movie. More importantly, I found myself reacting viscerally at many times--two words: car crash--and felt a sense of leaving a breathing world behind when I left the theater. Yes, there are plot holes, but why focus on those--especially since nearly any story has them--when there was so much fun in this movie? I loved it. If you enjoy the Marvel superhero movies, then you'll enjoy "Doctor Strange."

 

Go see it!

 

- M

Remember to "Fall Back" this weekend, for Daylight Savings Time.

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This weekend we get to set our clocks back an hour and sleep in. Yippee! Of course, that means we will be dreading "Leap Ahead" day at the other end of the equation where we lose an hour of sleep. To me, this is a dastardly plan to cause jet lag to an entire nation all at once. Nope, don't like the concept at all. My wife tells me I'm being over-dramatic--she's probably right--and that it's not such a big deal. It's been going on for a long time, and I doubt it'll change.

 

Technically, in the Fall we enter Daylight Standard Time and in the Spring we move to Daylight Savings Time. A quick perusal of the Wikipedia page demonstrates this concept is quite old actually, and various countries around the world use it. Generally speaking, the idea is supposed to save energy use (as the sun is shining, so less energy is spent lighting working areas). Of course, modern society doesn't behave the same as older ones, and we sure don't use gas lights or candles much either.

 

However you feel about it, it's the way things are around here. I don't suppose a one-person strike will accomplish much, so I will be complying with the rest of them. I will thoroughly enjoy an extra hour of sleep this weekend, and I am certain to be fully rested and eager to meet the day's work. Or, I'll just hit the snooze a couple times less. Either way, I appreciate having more time for once ... actually, what happens to that hour? Is it in limbo during half of the year and brought out to stare at the rest of the year? Hmm, I think scientific inquiry needs to be done to find out what happens to the hour in question.

 

- M

Happy Halloween!

 

I hope you all enjoy a wonderful day of fun and candy! And, maybe a couple of birthdays ...

 

Happy Halloween!

- M

Are heroes necessary? Why honor them?

Heroes in life are rare. Typically you find them amidst great tragedy and suffering. But, what's really interesting about heroes is their courage. I don't suppose you could even be a hero without it. We honor them because we want people of such quality around us, and maybe even encourage more to develop. I think deep inside we all hope we'll show such courage if the time ever comes.

 

In stories, heroes are common. Many stories wouldn't even exist without heroes. But, with stories we can experience heroic deeds, fight famous battles, and whisk away the damsel in distress. Through stories we can tame lions, ride dragons, and become a hero in our imaginations. Heroes inspire and motivate, even from the pages of a book. Heroes are good for us. Yes, they are examples, but they also demonstrate the incredible levels of courage we can possess too.

 

We honor true heroes. We mourn when heroes pass away. We relish heroism and flock to movies relating true life heroes. The new movie, "Hacksaw Ridge" is a perfect example. Plus, the Marvel Cinematic Universe is proving that the viewing public has huge cravings for superheroes--a natural extension of real life heroism. It makes sense; heroes have existed as long as the art of storytelling.

 

 

Yes, heroes are necessary and we should honor their sacrifices and heroism. And, they should be remembered in our stories.

 

- M

Wanting to see a romantic movie? I've got an oldie and goodie for you...

 

"Forever Young" is a romance that somehow gets overlooked. I'm not sure why. It features popular actors of the day: Mel Gibson and Jamie Lynn Curtis (along with a very young Elijah Wood). The plot is simple enough: Love-struck test pilot suffers tragedy and impulsively agrees to becoming a human popsicle. Yup, pretty dopey. But, this movie is very smartly written. Every scene needs to be there, and so many things setup a nice payoff later.

 

What do you want in a romance? You want your heart strings tugged, you want to cry, you want to laugh, you want everything wrapped up in a wonderful way. "Forever Young" does all of that. My wife and I watched it the other night and she loved it. The characters feel real. The situations don't require much to believe them. Even the silly setup takes hardly anything to sink in, because the story doesn't focus on the situation more than allowing it to frame the overall story.

 

I think the best part of "Forever Young" is how the characters actively trust one another. There's no tomfoolery going on, no backstabbing, and you want the characters to succeed. Yes, the movie makes you love the characters! That's a real treat these days. This movie was made in 1992, so some things are a bit dated, but the story has aged remarkably well. It's an innocent romance, with a huge heart, and will genuinely affect you for the better.  Check it out.

 

- M

Where are you from? What's your hometown?

My hometown -- Telfs, Austria

At some point, we nearly always ask new acquaintances where they come from. Why do we care? Why do we want to know? Sure, we ask because we love connecting with people who are from somewhere near our own area, but even when that isn't true we still want to know. We learn about places we haven't seen, things we haven't done, and cultures we'll never be a part of. In that sense, we grow as citizens of the world. Human beings thrive on interpersonal connections, so it's only natural that we want to further it whenever the opportunity arises.

 

From a personal perspective, answering the questions offer us the opportunity to dig into our own memories and relive a bit of our childhood. I'll never forget the mountains I grew up around, or the walks through pine forests with dry pine needles cracking underfoot, or even my walk to school and the adventures I had (thinking back, I even remember my schoolmates giving me a gift LP album of the "Three Little Pigs" dramatized story--no idea what happened to that record, but at least I remember it). Those memories makeup who we fundamentally are, and it's a treat to share those with other people.

 

In the end, both sides of the question gain and improve. It's what's called a "Win-Win" situation. Plus, if you're lucky, you'll discover someone with the same hometown and you've made a quick friend. My wife and I met three states away from where we actually lived, and all because she wanted to know where I was from. Ah, the joys of asking a simple question!

 

So, where are you from?

 

- M

Movie adaptations of popular stories.

I'm sure if it's a modern trend, but it sure seems like we see a lot more retellings of famous stories. Movies remake old movies, comics become movies, oral folktales show up in theaters. Yes, it's easy to take something which has already survived the test of time, yet it feels somehow cheap to do so. I love a good story, no matter the medium, and so I approach them all with an open mind.

 

 

"X-Men: Apocalypse" is a recent one which takes the wildly popular Apocalypse storyline and puts it on screen--with mixed results to be sure. I enjoyed it for what it was--a popcorn movie where you put your brain in a jar and enjoy the antics in front of you. We are heading toward the "Infinity Gauntlet" story in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, which will be in two movies, and I can hardly wait to see them. Another movie, which is a retread of a whole movie series, is "Godzilla" from 1998. Yes, that Godzilla movie. I enjoy it for what it is--a goofy, utterly silly, monster feature.

 

Why does the source material have to be taken seriously? Yes, it is popular and well-received originally, but if you simply retell it the same way then what have you accomplished? Stories need to find their own voices, even when that voice is from something already told. Think about any modern story and I'll bet you can find influences from other stories which came before it. We tend to build on what's been successful in the past. It's only natural. But, make sure to find something original within it. Make the story your own. If it excites you, then your audience will feel it in their bones. And, who doesn't want to be thrilled?

 

- M

Let's debate!

To be fair, it does take at least some concentration to debate.

Well, now that politics have thrown debates into common vocabulary for a little while ... why is debating such an uncommon practice? I'm not talking about arguing without any hope of persuasion, but providing reasoned arguments either for or against a topic. Schools have debate clubs, and there are national debate teams, yet few people ever learn how to debate at all. Mostly, it's just arguing and calling names. We can use fancy words to describe debates, but in my mind debates are a form of persuasion where you provide your view in the hopes of changing opinion.

 

I've tried to teach my children how to have a civil disagreement (sometimes loudly) without moving beyond arguing varying points and into abusive attacks. Yes, it's okay to disagree. Actually, tolerance is defined by having someone you disagree with and letting them carry on disagreeing. Debates hopefully clarify the pros and cons to any particular subject, so reasoned thought can determine which is best for you. Bickering and finger pointing does nothing to persuade anyone, and it only causes strife.

 

I'm the first to admit my emotions get enflamed when people loudly disagree with me. Still, why should such disagreement be shut down? It's good to be challenged in your own beliefs. In fact, I'm a big believer in facing challenge because it's only then that you find out just how firmly you hold your views. If you can't back up your viewpoint, then you probably don't have much reason to believe it, do you?

 

Aha! Suckered you into a debate, didn't I? Yup, I'm sneaky that way.

 

- M

Surprise! Happy --- something or other...

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Have you ever been the recipient of a surprise party? Birthday, work, award, or whatever? Was it really a surprise, or did you already know? The better question is, would you let anyone do it again if you knew in advance?

 

I've only had the pleasure once, at work. They got me good. I never saw it coming, nor even suspected--no easy feat for those who know me. It was at work, on my last day at a job. Everyone was there to wish me well. After the initial rush of surprise and embarrassment, I felt deeply honored. Yes, I wanted to hide from everyone's eyes, but my gratitude overcame my reluctance. No, I wouldn't ask for it, yet I can't say I'd never like to feel that way again. It was ... extraordinary.

 

Why is it we love to surprise people so much? I think we get just as much pleasure when we give the surprise. It's like a present for everyone involved. And, there's the fact of a party being involved. Even if the person isn't surprised, there's hopefully a lot of fun and joy. After all, I doubt people plan surprise parties to irritate and annoy ... well, at least not if your friends like you.

 

- M

Choose your own adventure

Did you ever read any of those "Choose your own adventure" type books when you were young? I always marveled at the variety and scope of them. It still fascinates me how these are created, because it seems like there's endless possibility and fun with every page. The process of writing those books must be like creating a complex maze, with twists and turns and dead ends aplenty. Yet, in the good ones, there's still a story to tell despite all the weaving about.

 

Have you created your own? Maybe in the back yard, amongst the ferns and undergrowth? My brother and I had massive fantasy battles that involved all sorts of armies and enemies. I'm sure we created nifty stories about it all, but it mainly gave us an excuse to play with pretend swords. My imagination had no trouble filling my little place in the world with untold dangers and thrills. Children can turn anything into a marvelous adventure!

 

I think the reason I have such fond memories of the "Choose your own adventure" books is because I got to choose what to do. Sure, the choice isn't really a free one--as there are only a few options--but I made the books my own. I even read them over and over so much that I still have them packed away somewhere. They are fun even now. My favorites were a series of three spy adventures, and it was like being James Bond.

 

Reading should be fun--at least for fiction--otherwise why would you bother reading in the first place?

 

-- M

Fall Break!

Ah, the notorious Fall Break is upon us. As a kid, I was excited. As a parent, I'm thinking of what to ask my children to do--which, I'm sure my children thoroughly appreciate. I can't say I ever took serious advantage of the break myself. Most times I just sat in my room, reading, drawing, playing games, or generally doing as little as possible.

 

We take breaks as adults as well, though we generally call them vacations or holidays. Just like our kids, we do very little beyond sightseeing or having fun. It's a time to unwind, enjoy friends, and take life less seriously. I think we don't take them often enough. Even little get-aways are a good thing. It doesn't need to be a multi-week experience, but can easily encompass a single day.

 

I don't begrudge my kids settling back and taking things easy (so long as they get their chores done). Life demands so much of us in adulthood, it's hard to see beyond it. Maybe that's why Peter Pan is such a loved hero? A boy who can't grow up, and get's to play forever. Hmm, maybe I could get some tights and a little knife and a goofy hat ... all it takes is a happy thought, right?

 

-- M

Decorating your room

As a guy, my sense of decoration pretty much ends with having four walls. I put up things that interest me, rather than what looks nice. I suppose my writing studio has a certain dramatic style. My wife, on the other hand, has impeccable taste. She manages to bring life to our house in ways I could never have imagined before. It's magical how she arranges and tinkers and makes our home a place to love.

I would've loved to have this as a kid!
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I often think about how things have changed as I've grown older. One that hasn't is the deep desire to make my room my own place of expression. We naturally want a spot that's purely ours, with our stuff and our toys. Maybe that's why showing someone your room is such a personal and intimate gesture? Certainly allowing someone to remain in your room for more than a little look is a special privilege. Is the same true across the world?

 

Watching someone decorate is like getting a peek inside their minds. Little children decorate drawing pages with swoops and swirls of colors, often with little regard to the overall look, simply because they enjoy the process. As we age, we put more meaning into our doodles, until we create our own signature style and flair. Maybe some never reach such lofty heights--I'm sure I never have--yet when we see what some people have achieved, it's jaw dropping.

 

- M

Understanding allegory: The Emperor's New Clothes

Somehow we have forgotten how to put our minds to work as we read. I'm not sure when it happened, but I've seen more and more confusion about simple children's stories. One such is "The Emperor's New Clothes," by Hans Christian Andersen. If you haven't read it, then follow the link and check it out.

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 This tale spells out it's meaning at the end, but the value is far beyond the simple observations. The point the author was bringing up was how people are capable of fully believing a lie while at the same time knowing it as a lie. George Orwell does much the same in the book, "1984," with the concept of "doublethink." Put bluntly, the Emperor in the story is naked and is too proud to admit he's been fooled by devious tailors, so he only suspects he's naked and forces himself to continue the sham. Therefore, he is on display to everyone as naked and shamed. "The Emperor has no clothes" means it is fakery, illusion, trickery, and is in fact all lies.

 

How often have we, ourselves, done the exact same?

 

Fiction is typically written for pure entertainment, so doesn't have deep lessons to teach. However, authors are human beings and so imbed such lessons anyway, though mostly implied. "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy is chock full of lessons, despite being a great fantasy. When you read, take a bit of time to digest what you've read. Think about it. There's good stuff beyond the words on the page, and sometimes you'll find an even deeper story floating there. If you need a starting point, go back to "Aesop's Fables" and enjoy figuring them out ... yup, some are just weird.

 

- M

Falling in love, again and again and again.

 

I hope I'll never for a moment forget the whirlwind of emotions of meeting my future bride. She is my best friend, my confidant, and constant companion. I can't imagine life without her. I never expected to find her and now see her everywhere. I find myself falling in love with her over and over. There are a million little things she does that make me grin. A single glance from her can send me into orbit. She has a smile that is mine, and mine alone. I always know I'm home when I see her face light up.

 

When I saw my children born, I experienced the surge of instant love I'd only read about until then. It's a different sort of love, yet every bit as strong as my love for my wife. The funny thing is, I find myself growing in leaps of love for them as well. I could never have imagined such depth even ten years ago, much less twenty. Children are a profound blessing.

 

I think we're hard wired to love. Look how easily we extend our love to the animals we choose as pets, or any animals at all for that matter. Loving is as natural as breathing. If I live to be a hundred, I hope I'll fall in love with my wife and kids a whole lot more.

 

- M

Stage Musicals from Movies

Back when the "Lion King" came out, and subsequently became a huge hit, I remember talk of turning it into a Broadway musical. I thought the idea absurd (hey, I was young and the idea seemed so crazy, and didn't realize there's a long history of that very thing). But, I've always loved musicals. I grew up with "Sound of Music" and "Fiddler on the Roof" and "Westside Story," so it's in my blood to enjoy them.

 

One I sadly just became aware of is the musical "Ghost," inspired by the movie of the same name. That movie had a singularly powerful effect on me: when it was over, I felt like the real world was a shadow and the movie was true. I'm aware such mental shifts happen, but hadn't experienced it before. It didn't last long, but the emotion was overwhelming. The musical surges with that emotion through the music. Likely I'll never have opportunity to see it, which is a pity.

 

What especially impresses me is how the music is created with such sensitivity to the source movie. I've never written music, so it seems incredibly hard and difficult work. Yet, there are a constant stream of such musicals, even with movies hardly dealing with music much at all--such as, "Bridges of Madison County" or "Rocky" and even "Carrie"). The variety is astounding. Hopefully I'll have opportunity to see some Broadway shows; high on my list are "Beauty and the Beast" and "Les Miserable."

 

It's well worth seeing a stage musical, and there's plenty to choose from!

 

- M

The Joys of an Accurate Narrator

Much of the time the narrator of stories is completely reliable, accurately describing events around them. The audience quickly gets used to it and so is easily surprised by twists and turns. I'm not sure why we usually trust a story's narrator, but I certainly do. Maybe it's because the story won't make much sense if the narrator is complicating things with all kinds of lies. That's the easy answer. I think audiences prefer not being tasked with deciphering the story they are enjoying. But, like everything in life, there are exceptions.

 

Sherlock Holmes and Watson

I think of the stories of "Sherlock Holmes" and the narrator, Watson. In this situation, the narrator is not the brilliant mind--though he is very capable himself--yet he is methodical in narration. In fact, the only doubt is on Sherlock's shoulders, as he is constantly obscuring information and coming at cases from odd angles. That's all in the fun of a "Sherlock Holmes" story though, and so we follow poor Watson in our own deductions. From a writer's point of view, having the narrator not be Sherlock makes it possible to point out facts without giving away the solution to the mystery--because Watson is prone to noting red herrings while ignoring items Holmes himself is examining.

 

A perspective quite a few stories take is the omniscient third-person narrator--which allows the audience to know the thoughts of anyone and the activities of anything. The all-knowing viewpoint. You can hardly mistrust anything presented this way. Movies are usually this format, since it's really hard to do it differently without narrowing the presentation to simply following the main character around. The downside is this viewpoint doesn't color the narration with any kind of emotion and relies on the characters and events to portray it instead.

 

Personally, I usually like accurate narrators much more than twisted or lying narrators. But, there are times when I long for a mystery and topsy-turvy joy.

 

- M

Smiling is an art form

Nothing says happy quite like a grinning hippo

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I've always appreciated a good smile, but I've been baffled why some are so much more pleasant to look at than others. I'm aware that some people practice in front of a mirror to achieve a radiant smile, though a few are blessed with a megawatt grin without any effort at all (we call them photogenic, when we're feeling good about ourselves and freaks when we aren't). Despite the effort, there is an overwhelming change that sweeps over a face when a smile blooms.

 

As I've grown older, I think I appreciate smiles much more. I seek out smiling people far more than frowns. I just don't want to be around grumpy people. After all, if I'm going to spend my time with someone, I'd like to be happy about it. Also, it's far more pleasant to communicate if both parties smile. Now, I'm talking about real smiles, not those forced smiles we see on politicians too often. Yup, I've practiced before a mirror, just before a family reunion--so the pictures would turn out, instead of bleeding through the side of the cameras.

 

Kids smile all the time. Why not? Everything is new to them, and they're easily excited. Their emotions show on their faces before their brain even knows what's going on. On the path to adulthood we apparently decide at some point that smiling is not good, so we stop. I don't understand that. We've all seen a face "light up" when they smile, so why are we against doing the same? Personally, I try to keep in mind that my outward attitude does illuminate my inner attitudes. Maybe a smile isn't easy, but it's good practice for when you really want to grin.

 

- M