Castles and romance, a match made in Heaven.

Castles are often depicted, in pictures and stories, as having a fair maiden charming knights from on top of the walls--or needing rescuing from a tall tower. They are depicted as places of endless romance, chivalry, and epic battles. Sure, the realities are not nearly as exciting or fun, but let's forget those things for now. In popular culture, castles represent a time of heroes, knights, fair maidens, honor, challenge, triumph and villains.

I've grown up around actual castles, and have walked through them, so I love them almost as much as I do mountains. They are towering structures, imposing in their strength, and marvelous in their engineering. Actually, it's pretty incredible that many are still standing, considering they were built hundreds of years ago. I would love to vacation in one, to experience how the walls absorb history and the atmosphere you can only experience in person. There's inherent greatness in castles to match their huge walls.

Marienburg Castle, Germany

Why does our culture romanticize the times of castles so much? Well, because it was long ago, these structures are imposing, knights are interesting, and things seem simple compared with today. But, I think it's mostly because we yearn for times of honor, truthfulness, dignity, and solace. So, we project these ideas onto a time long ago and not well understood. Then, we fill the concept with stories and imagery reinforcing those ideas. It becomes a safe retreat from reality, a little paradise of its own, and a wellspring of romance.

- M

Romance to last a lifetime

I really enjoy taking my wife out on dates. We talk and laugh and look in each other's eyes. There are many times when I feel we share each other's heartbeats, and breathe the same breaths. It's wondrous and surprising, bewildering and enchanting, magical and completely real. In her, I see all my dreams come true. Yes, miracles do happen--she agreed to marry me, and amazingly still appreciates my company. I can't imagine life without her. She's my soul-mate.

 

 

When I was a pining teenager, yearning for the tender kisses of love and finding them only in books and music, I comforted myself with the promise that someday my day would come. Funny thing is, I never saw it coming. Actually, when I met her, she fast became my ... best friend. There wasn't any romance in the relationship at all. We talked about everything and nothing at all. I wanted her insight and wisdom, and I revealed things to her I've never told anyone else. We got to know each other and I liked her a lot. I trusted her completely.

 

Sometime in the mix, friendship moved into something much deeper--love. I still can't place my finger on the exact time it happened. Actually, I'm not even sure I understood what romantic love was, but I was willing to take the risk with her. We prayed constantly and took it slow. She was much more eager, but never pushed me. Our friendship changed to love and deepened every day. Our love for each other is still maturing, each day. I can hardly imagine a richer love, yet I know in 25 more years it will be far beyond what I understand today.

 

Like I said, miracles do happen.

 

- M

Wanting to see a romantic movie? I've got an oldie and goodie for you...

 

"Forever Young" is a romance that somehow gets overlooked. I'm not sure why. It features popular actors of the day: Mel Gibson and Jamie Lynn Curtis (along with a very young Elijah Wood). The plot is simple enough: Love-struck test pilot suffers tragedy and impulsively agrees to becoming a human popsicle. Yup, pretty dopey. But, this movie is very smartly written. Every scene needs to be there, and so many things setup a nice payoff later.

 

What do you want in a romance? You want your heart strings tugged, you want to cry, you want to laugh, you want everything wrapped up in a wonderful way. "Forever Young" does all of that. My wife and I watched it the other night and she loved it. The characters feel real. The situations don't require much to believe them. Even the silly setup takes hardly anything to sink in, because the story doesn't focus on the situation more than allowing it to frame the overall story.

 

I think the best part of "Forever Young" is how the characters actively trust one another. There's no tomfoolery going on, no backstabbing, and you want the characters to succeed. Yes, the movie makes you love the characters! That's a real treat these days. This movie was made in 1992, so some things are a bit dated, but the story has aged remarkably well. It's an innocent romance, with a huge heart, and will genuinely affect you for the better.  Check it out.

 

- M

Romance ... a guy's point of view

Traditionally speaking, women are the romantic titans of our world. But, that certainly hasn't stopped me, and many other men, from tickling the brains of our lovely mates. So, I thought I'd speak about romance from a man's point of view; what it means to us, why we do it, and especially how we manage. Don't worry, it's nothing you can't handle.

 

First is what romance means to a man (also tying into why). Not to be crude, but it means we get girls. At least, that's the starting point. We do actually desire to make life grand and exciting for the women in our lives. And, we know romance matters, so there is great motivation to get good at it. Sadly, many men forget this fact after marriage and let it all lapse. Romance is just as important afterwards as it is beforehand. Sure, it's not a swimmingly natural thing for us guys, but the work is more worthwhile than anything else.

 

The difficult part is managing romance. Getting a book and following the steps can help (at least giving ideas) but it's artificial and women know it--though I suspect they appreciate the effort. Guys have a more utilitarian focus when it comes to romance (which is how the stereotypical blender gift came about), but with a bit of thought it really isn't very hard to sweep a woman off her feet. Sincerity, honesty, and heaps of respect are very sweet romance. I've had particular success with love letters--no surprise as I'm a writer--but written letters are keepsakes and will be treasured and kept, trust me.

 

From a man's point of view, romance is a path to a great finish. It's not that we don't value romance itself--we do actually--it's just that we mainly focus on the results. We laugh and joke about it. We act shy and blush at the mention. But, it's far more important to us than we let on.

 

xoxoxoxo Hugs and Kisses xoxoxoxo

- M

Love, the great emotion of poets, artists, and the common hopeless romantic.

When I was ending my years as a teenager and becoming a young man, I went through a time of incredible yearning for a loving companion. I knew she was "Somewhere Out There"--a great song by the way, and one I listened to a lot at the time--but the longing was so strong it was overpowering. I listened to love songs constantly, weeping into my headphones, and my parents didn't have any idea. Probably they are reading these words now and had no clue I went through such times. But, I wasn't alone. People all over the world long for enduring love that breaks all boundaries.

Because of that time, I have a powerful romantic streak. It takes work, but oh wow is it ever worth it. My glorious wife is a treasure I couldn't have imagined back then. She surpasses any hopes and dreams I might have had, and has shown me depths of love I can't begin to describe. Love like that changes you continually, unshakably, and permanently. If I could give any blessing, it would be love.

So, of course there is unending lyricism about love. It can't ever be completely described. And so, we write songs, wax poetic, and buy flowers in hopes of getting close. That longing has produced a dazzling variety of work, and some of the finest artistic talent in their respective fields. It's like the search for love is the muse the Greeks wrote about--you know, those fun loving folks who divinely inspire creativity.

Love changes the world you live in, breathe in, and create in.

- M

Why all the weeping and crying?

I've written about love stories a few times, and I have a question for you all: why do love stories end up being weepy? It's actually pretty funny how predictably people cry during love stories. Sure, the basic plot is for someone to end up with their soul mate and sail off into the sunset (though sometimes the end is tragic death). Still, why this modern version of love stories? There are many other ways to tell a story about love.

I'd like to see more love stories in the style of Anne of Green Gables. Yes, even as a guy, I can like that story. We hear all the time how girls are wanting strong female characters, and I offer you Anne. She is strong, independent, willing to make a mess out of things, willing to work hard, and willing to sacrifice. Yes, the movies get a bit confused at the end, but this is a great story.

How about a love story that begins with love and ends with love, showing a deepening and progression from puppy love, through the stirrings of deep love and into the mature warmth of commitment that isn't based on emotion but mutual promise. Personally, I haven't seen a movie such as this for a very long time, if ever. I think this is needed, especially in our modern age of fast-food love. We need examples of loving that is mature and unselfish. Be honest, would you prefer to weep a bit at the end, or look at your partner and sigh, "I want our love to be like that!"

There's great power in a well made love story. Shakespeare famously brought two warring factions together through love in "Romeo and Juliet," and throughout spoke eloquently of politics and anger. I think a love story captures the attention in a special way, and it's not just to make you cry. Love is one of the greatest reasons to make a story. Make it special. Worthwhile. The subject deserves it.

- M

Tearjerkers. Why can't we get enough of them?

Some stories are deliberately designed to well up the emotions and create powerful connections within the audience. Rightly called "tearjerkers" they are sometimes romances, or tragedies, and many times are true life tales. These days, we see Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest posts with heart-warming tales of people helping each other, or lost pets being found, This is one I found not long ago, and I cried: A gift over the radio. I'm grateful we have these stories, I really am. These things reinforce the kindness and caring we have for each other. They inspire us to be better and more than what we normally are.

Other stories that make us cry work in much the same way. As an audience, we experience deep emotion whenever characters feel pain, or overcome heavy burdens, or help the unfortunate. No matter how old we are, with a bit of care an author can pluck those heartstrings like a symphony and have us weeping a river of tears. Perhaps its a love story, or a silly weekend outing that brings a family together, and maybe a crazy story of lost pets finding their way back home. Whatever the story, we respond to them. I doubt anyone who has seen Old Yeller will forget how thunderstruck we were at the finale. Congratulations, the story mattered to you!

I believe we will want fresh stories that make us cry until the dawn of time. We won't ever have too many. So, keep on making them, sharing them, and shouting out for more!

- M