Things I leanred from my parents

When I was a little boy, my parents were the wisest and most all-knowing people on the planet. As I grew older, my opinion shifted to believe I was a fool to listen to these old-as-dirt folks. Now that I have children of my own (who probably think I'm just as useless), I want to know what my parents think about most things. You see, I finally actually grew up and value the great experience and wisdom of my parents. They are a treasure beyond any sought after by Indiana Jones types.

There's a phrase we hear a lot, "Experience is the best teacher." Sure, that's true to a point, but I'd much prefer having someone teach me who's already suffered through actual experience. My parents never held back their wisdom; I was sadly too arrogant to accept their advice. Sure, they aren't right about everything, but who is? I value what they have to say, even if it did take me my whole life to realize it.

The truth is, modern America doesn't value our elders as we should. They are lifetimes of experience on tap, happy to give it freely, and yet are mostly ignored. That's a real shame. What better way to understand history than to ask those who lived through it? How many are still alive who passed through World War 2, or the various regional wars? Open your minds and your hearts, then keep your mouths shut and listen. Learn.

- M

Let's debate!

To be fair, it does take at least some concentration to debate.

Well, now that politics have thrown debates into common vocabulary for a little while ... why is debating such an uncommon practice? I'm not talking about arguing without any hope of persuasion, but providing reasoned arguments either for or against a topic. Schools have debate clubs, and there are national debate teams, yet few people ever learn how to debate at all. Mostly, it's just arguing and calling names. We can use fancy words to describe debates, but in my mind debates are a form of persuasion where you provide your view in the hopes of changing opinion.

 

I've tried to teach my children how to have a civil disagreement (sometimes loudly) without moving beyond arguing varying points and into abusive attacks. Yes, it's okay to disagree. Actually, tolerance is defined by having someone you disagree with and letting them carry on disagreeing. Debates hopefully clarify the pros and cons to any particular subject, so reasoned thought can determine which is best for you. Bickering and finger pointing does nothing to persuade anyone, and it only causes strife.

 

I'm the first to admit my emotions get enflamed when people loudly disagree with me. Still, why should such disagreement be shut down? It's good to be challenged in your own beliefs. In fact, I'm a big believer in facing challenge because it's only then that you find out just how firmly you hold your views. If you can't back up your viewpoint, then you probably don't have much reason to believe it, do you?

 

Aha! Suckered you into a debate, didn't I? Yup, I'm sneaky that way.

 

- M

Dumb, Stupid, and Really Bad Planning.

Ever do something with thought and planning only to find out it was embarrassingly stupid? I can't be the only one. The funny thing is, we don't necessarily realize right away how dumb it really was. Sometimes we go on thinking we just didn't do it right and try again a few more times. That's gotta be the reason so many people tried riding a barrel over Niagara Falls. I don't believe anyone could possibly be that stupid without truly believing they were performing a brilliant stunt. Of course, there's always the hero complex reason, but going for glory only takes someone so far before they question the sanity of the quest.

photo credit

As kids we probably do more than our share of stupid stunts. It's only natural as we test our limits and discover what's a good idea and what isn't. I sure did. I'll never forget my great plan of seeing how far I could throw a brick into the air. I put it on a plank of wood, with another brick near the center as a fulcrum, then I jumped up on the board and watched the brick go into orbit. At least that's what I thought would happen. It must have gone fairly high, because I didn't see it hit the ground, and I sure wasn't looking up, so I took a few steps to the side and ... whammo! Right in the forehead. The next thing I remember is waking up and seeing our big oak tree sticking out of the ground sideways. Yup, I knocked myself cold.

Thing is, I realized it might arc into me, so I stepped aside, and the blasted thing nailed me anyway. And, yes, I planned it all out, even so far as realizing I didn't want to look up and get it in the nose. Planning didn't help at all, it was a foolish, stupid, moronic thing to do.

Hopefully we learn from such mistakes and educate ourselves. Then, perhaps and hopefully, we make better choices.

- M