The pleasure of sitting still and being quiet.

My daughter, and my brother, having fun.

Since the very beginning of our lives, we live in a world of spinning excitement, which never quite stops for anything. There's a constant whirl of activity all around us. It seems we fill out lives with so much to do, that we never pause to let it just happen. Watch a baby, as they are incapable of large actions and don't interrupt with lots of talking, and you'll see they keenly observe everything. They want to be involved in the world, but can only interact in a limited way. Yet, they are a part of it all, even without dancing around. Just because you sit still, doesn't mean you're a lump of coal.

I think we forget to stop and be quiet. How frequently do you turn off everything and just sit still? My guess is you had to think about it for a while. Our lives swirl with activity, at times so intense we get headaches from the din. We pine for vacations and to get away from it all. Well, just sit down and relax, without any entertainment or chaotic noise. Anyone can do it. Anyone can take the time. Anyone is in the position, every day, to stop and relax. It's one of the healthiest activities we can undertake, and you'll find that stress doesn't quite pile up like it usually does.

The more technology marches forward, the more I find myself wanting to let less of it into my life. It's funny, because I'm a programmer, a tech nerd, and love computers. But, I also have noticed how there's less personal contact and less community than ever before. We know more about everything and less of everyone. I think my desire to sit quietly and peacefully is a reaction to this. I'd never want less technology, as it has provided a standard of living previously unknown, but I also recognize a need to slow down and enjoy life as it is. Take a moment to sit and be quiet, and listen and dream and live.

- M

Be careful of the heat, or suffer the consequences.

Perhaps you've heard the term "Sun stroke" or "Heat stroke" in relation to getting too hot out in the sun. Sure, you sweat and are uncomfortable, but how bad is it really? We joke about "sweating like a pig" and just go merrily about our business. In this summer of heavy heat, I feel the need to make sure everyone understands how serious this really is. You see, I used to laugh at the heat and did my best to work despite it and the sweat. Then ... I suffered a real sun stroke (to the point where I stopped sweating, got nauseous, felt chilled, all of it) and then a while later it happened again. As a result, my body became extremely sensitive to heat and I've since had heat exhaustion and heat stroke multiple times. I lost the ability to sweat at all (you might think this is great, but I cannot cool down without a cold shower, and I hope you see how limiting that is to my life), which means air conditioning is quite literally keeping me alive.

I think we forget just how frail our bodies can be, and so we tough it out and think we can will ourselves to be okay. Sure, you can build a tolerance to heat, but not all at once. You need to work up to it, and for those who haven't gotten used to hot climates it is essential that you monitor your body. Drink plenty of water, keep out of the direct sunlight if you can, and pay attention. People who are suffering from the heat aren't fully aware what's happening to them. Watching for heat exhaustion is a buddy affair, and you need to keep each other healthy.

The reason I'm bringing this up now, is I've seen lots of people saying "Just suck it up, there's plenty of people who've been hotter and they're fine." I'm sure that's true. It's also true that people survive being shot in the chest, but I'd still go to the hospital if it happened to me. Don't simplify other people's health concerns. Would you do the same for anyone you care about? I hope not. Remember, we are in this together. Don't let yourself, or others, suffer because of some misplaced sense of toughness.

- M

Coughing up a lung

We use some very descriptive, albeit strange, phrases when we talk about our problems. Severe coughing can be, "coughing up a lung." Extreme tiredness is, "dog tired." Being very sleepy is, "falling asleep, standing up." The list could nearly go on forever. For some reason, we love to not only exaggerate, but provide ridiculous extremes. Have you ever seen someone "sleep like a log?" ... that is, sleeping so heavily they're hard to wake up.

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There's a deep reason we use these phrases, it's because we want other people to understand not only the physical issues but the associated emotions. We want others to experience the same thing, and ridiculously over-the-top phrases help that happen. Also, I believe there's a deep sense of playfulness in all our languages. We love to laugh, to have fun, to be silly.

So, next time you find yourself explaining that you're hungry enough to "eat a horse," just smile and acknowledge the exaggeration. The people you're talking with understand what you mean, and won't fault you for the livid imagery. I doubt anyone will take you completely seriously, and if they do then they don't possess a sense of humor. I think everyone should work on laughing, and seek out opportunities to exercise the talent. Just don't laugh yourself to death...

- M

Headaches are never welcome

Have you ever had a headache? If not, then have you ever been in a situation that can be classified as a "headache?" Probably all of us have. The phrase typically means that a situation or problem is tough and problematic. Dealing with such things are tough and make you rub your head in frustration. Headaches. Now, if you do actually have a physical headache, you have my sympathies because those are terrible.

Life isn't gentle, and life isn't fair. I think that should be stamped on the inside of everyone's eyelids (joking, of course). The point is, we can't escape tough situations. Yes, they cause headaches, but when we pass through them, hopefully successfully, we grow personally and mentally. Without difficult times, we all would be pathetic weaklings, unable to adapt to change. Stress is necessary to maturity--though constant, unceasing, stress is awful and I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

Why bring this up? Well, I see a current trend toward making everything easy and stress-less, with no headache-inducing problems. This won't help the next generation of young adults. I sure don't want my doctor to view my diagnosis through the lens of not upsetting me, or my auto mechanic to ignore my brakes because telling me they are bad would make me fret. No. Don't hide the truth, don't suppress the difficulties in life. Face the headaches straight on, get past them, and mature as a person. You'll be all the better for it, and oddly will discover fewer headaches in your future as a direct result.

- M

Season of the sick

Wow, flu season has struck us hard this year. It seems everyone is sick with something or another. Be it stomach upsets, actual flu, the horrid blahs, or full out toilet worship, people are getting sick a lot. At my work, I don't think anyone has managed to dodge this stuff. It's incredible. Kinda makes it feel like the end of days, doesn't it?

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Getting sick is never fun, and usually pretty awful really. I wonder if we'll ever completely cure diseases? It makes for great science fiction, but it doesn't seem likely. For a kid, though, it's fun to miss school and sit and watch cartoons all day. Ah, to be a kid again ... Anyway, for adults sickness is more of an annoyance because it prevents us from working and earning a living. Fortunately, modern medicine has enabled us to weather these illnesses without too much trouble.

I think we take our health for granted quite a bit. It's unusual to be unhealthy in modern society, and actually a bit of a stigma. We don't like being around the sick, even if they're close family and friends. My wife has a special gift to care for the sick, and I'm constantly dazzled by her ability. There's a special place in Heaven for anyone who is able to comfort and aid the weakest among us. Plus, I think the rest of us also are very grateful for the care you provide, because when we're sick we'll happily accept help and kindness.

- M

Hot and cold

People tend to talk about the weather wherever you go. Be it simple small talk, or actually a main topic, the weather affects us all. There's an old joke about farmers that goes: "What do you call a bunch of farmers hanging out in the basement? Answer: A whine cellar." (for those who don't understand, the weather is never good enough for farmers ... it's too dry ... it's too wet ... there's too little rain ... there's too much ... and on and on).

It goes to show how we will complain about anything and everything. How crazy to comment about things we have no control over and directly benefit from? I challenge everyone to find something good to say about the weather for the next week straight. Can you do it? Of course. And, I'll bet you find much positive to say about a lot of other things as well. You see, optimism is contagious. Spread it far and wide. Want to change the world? Well, start with being happy about the world you live in (but, not crazy and overboard, that's just weird).

So, while it's been cold and warm here, I am happy to say I've survived. I expect to finish out the day and look forward to another adventure tomorrow! Maybe I'll fight a dragon, or ride a rocket, or enjoy a wonderful beach ... or, I'll just sit at work and type for a while ... eh, it all works just fine. But, I'd prefer a dragon if you know any.

- M

I'm getting a headache ... no problem, here's a carrot.

Why does an apple a day keep the doctor away? How does eating carrots make your eyes better? Does drinking water upside down really cure hiccups? Where did all these silly traditions come from? And, why do we persist in believing them? For me, it's all in good fun. Wherever the idea of carrots for eyes came from, it sure didn't work in my case. Yes, I know vitamins are important, but my eyesight is horrid and no vitamins will cure that. But, it's fun to joke about eating carrots.

There are plenty of wild and wacky medical inventions created throughout the years. I enjoy searching for devices from the 1800's especially, because some seem at the outset like possibly good ideas ... and then you see the device and wonder just what particular plant they were smoking when they came up with the idea? I wonder how many sold? I suppose they did great business, because there sure were lots of insane inventions on the market. You never know, maybe they even did some good.

Based on this history, I'm betting we'll always have ridiculous ideas (I remember the grapefruit diet, among others). People are keen to find new and revolutionary methods to improve health, despite no evidence whatsoever. Also, there's plenty who will believe anything so long as it's advertised in an attractive way--watch any state fair steak knives sales pitch and you'll agree. Ideas are quick, easy, sometimes work, sometimes don't. But, without ideas, we go stagnant ... so, keep up with the apples and carrots, just don't expect it to work all the time.

- M

Sneezing your head off

I'm renown for having powerful sneezes. I can't help it. I've tried reducing the power, but that hurts my head badly and I'm sure that isn't a good thing. So, my family has gotten used to it--usually having a laugh at my expense--and I've passed on the trait to my son. Sigh. Well, today I startled myself. There's a box piano next to my desk and when I sneezed, the piano rang. Yes, just like I'd thumped it with my fist. Good grief.

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There are a lot of phrases that come to mind when people do big and large things: strong like a horse, big as a mountain, tough as nails, trumpet like an elephant. Maybe I can add a new one to the list ... "Knocks pianos out of tune." Hmm, doesn't quite have the punch I'd prefer. Oh well.

Do you know anyone who you good-naturedly point out as a freak of nature? Being one of them, I can't say I mind all that much. It's humorous ribbing, stuff that friends do when they're together. My best friend could be described as a human vacuum cleaner, because I swear he never actually chews anything--I've seen him devour a cheeseburger in the blink of an eye ... twice. In my view, these things just make life entertaining, so long as you take the time to notice.

- M

ps. If you haven't sneezed by now, then I'm disappointed.

A nice, hot, cup of tea solves any problem or boo boo.

The British love their tea, and for good reason: tea heals and comforts, soothes and relaxes, quenches both thirst and passion. A nice hot cup of tea makes any family intrusion welcome. Many cultures use tea customs for negotiation and peace. Tea is better than coffee!

Food is a source of many comforts, creativity, and challenge. It's interesting how a basic necessity of life can have such variety. I mean, oxygen is needed, but there's only one sort. Sleep is essential, yet there's not much else you can do but go unconscious. What makes tea so special, is how we turn the requirement of hydration into an experience which passes into art and bliss. Tea is even healthy, unlike nasty smelling coffee.

I think we use tea (and, reluctantly, coffee) to glue together the connections between us. The aroma softens hardships dividing us, the taste loosens the tongue, and the warmth lifts the spirits. Tea is a miracle beverage! If we all could just drink a bit more tea, then the world would not only be a better place, but it would thrive. Can you imagine how few crimes there'd be, if we all could sit down and share a cup of tea? Beyond imagination...

- M

Salt water is good for your health!

I've recently discovered that there are no allergies in the middle of the ocean! Woohoo! I'm moving there tomorrow. My plan is to float on a city-sized raft and enjoy blissful breathing without any stuffiness or grogginess. I haven't figured out all the details yet, but the plan seems solid and workable. I am a bit concerned about being run over by cargo ships and cruise liners, but they have radar and will avoid my awesome raft city.

See? Even dogs love salt water!

Apparently this is all made super convenient by the presence of so much salt. Sinus cavities are cleaned out by salty air, and salt is good for your skin as well (that's why people go to the Dead Sea and have a good soak in the water). Also, salt water makes floating on your back extremely easy--to the point where going for a dive is very difficult. Of course, I could also be some sort of mutant balloon-like human who's natural habitat is meant to be airborne? [note: That's fine with me by the way]

My wife understands now--especially now that she's had a chance to swim in the ocean. She'll probably love floating on the raft, without anything to do but stitch and quilt and loaf around. I'll become a tough and tanned survival man, ready to take on the world with my bare hands! I bet I'd be able to punch a shark and make it my best buddy (I'll call it Ralph).

Just think: all this from salt water! What a deal!

- M

Wisdom teeth ... makes wise?

I've been told that wisdom teeth are so named because it shows the person is now old enough to be wise. Erm, no. For me, I'm blessed with a small mouth and giant teeth, so I had mine taken out pretty early. I've heard that some people manage to keep them and are then apparently quite wise. Should the story include a penalty for having the wisdom teeth pulled out? Hmm, that would make for a better urban legend, I think.

 

Trouble is, getting teeth pulled hurts. A lot. And, getting four monster molars pulled at the same time is a prescription for agony. We all have ways of dealing with pain, but pain in your mouth is one of the worst kinds. You can't get away from it. It's not like you can stop moving your jaw for long periods. My trouble is that my tongue seems to have a life of its own, and the silly thing keeps probing at places it shouldn't. Result? Ouch.

 

Maybe wisdom teeth do make you wise after all? You learn quite a lot about pain and managing discomfort. Those are definitely worthwhile lessons. And, life serves up quite a few painful teaching moments, that's for sure. I just wish we didn't have to go through the pains first. But, I'd bet we wouldn't learn anything if it didn't hurt when we did wrong. There's another life lesson.

 

Wow, wisdom teeth do make you smerter!

 

- M

Life is tough, so chew slowly and take small bites

I haven't eaten a real steak in years. I don't have enough molars in my mouth to chew steak. Yesterday, I had my last set of usable molars extracted. Still, I'm grateful that food isn't completely denied me. There are lots of people far worse off than me. Life has a way of keeping us on our toes. Like the old saying, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade." Yes, it's trite and overused, but the principle holds even now. Adapt, change, work out a new way of doing things. But, don't give up.

I suppose there are some people who haven't ever had a thing go wrong, but I've never met one. So, we can all relate to one another, and yet everyone's pain is unique and unknowable. Yup, life is crazy. Yet, we toddle around and make the best of it. Humans are like that--we take a beating and get up and find a way through anyway. Maybe we should keep a tally of our falls, just for fun? Perhaps we could give awards, and celebrate the triumphs? Sure, there are already awards for excellence, but why not for stubborn resilience? Just a thought.

 

So, here I am, encouraging you all to press on and finish what you started. Yes, we all get knocked down, face fears, suffer countless agonies, and basically get pounded on. Despite all this, I hope you know that it's worth it in the end. Fight for your dreams; keep them alive, no matter what. And, never give up!

 

- M

Cats just don't like taking their medicine ...

Having pets is a great part of growing up. Children learn to care for something that's actually totally dependent on them. Also, kids get to enjoy the incredible love pets have for their owners. I think it's one of the very best things for helping children become adults. I grew up with dogs, and my own kids have had cats. It's been great, and the cats have developed amazing bonds with all three of my children. I'm happy.

 

However--

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When these curious little creatures need medicine for ailments, they turn into vicious bobcats. I swear I have been chewed on, scratched, mauled, and near blind so many times I've lost count. What's so hard about taking a pill, or taking a bit of medicine? I hate cough syrup, but I'll down it if I must. Cats just don't let you explain it to them. It's not a difficult concept, after all. They just shut off and ignore my comforting pleading. Hey, I'm doing it for their own good--don't they know that?

 

I think it's high time my kids get the joy of this adventure. After all, it's part of animal ownership, right? Of course, I'll be there to enjoy the fireworks. I would be a terrible father if I didn't laugh at the plight of both parties (one of the perks of being a parent, I think). All in good fun, certainly. I'll be there to bandage wounds and pat the little darlings on the head. Hey, growing up is tough, so may as well get a tough skin early. It's for your own good. Honest.

 

- M

Stress and Strain

What happens when you apply stress to something? Well, it bends or breaks, there's not much else. Unlike life, within a story the stress is carefully measured and played to provide tension and relief. By being careful, the author can crank up the stress and put the audience on the edge of their seats, without making it so awful that we want to cry and give up. Sure there are stories that intentionally make the strain so fierce we want to back away, but even those can be so enticing we want to struggle through it for the hoped-for payoff at the end--kind of like a rollercoaster.

It's probably safe to say we all know people who have cracked under tremendous stress (perhaps even ourselves). It's not pretty most of the time. Stress can break you into little pieces, grind you down, and pulverize the rest. Or, with help, you can rebuild yourself into something stronger and tougher, the way a martial artist toughens their body and will. It's a marvelous thing to witness! I applaud anyone who has come through the fire and been reborn.

Times of stress are never enjoyable. I think of the great heroes of literature, and their worst times were pretty awful. But, we all want the end result, I think. We want to be brave, heroic, able to face the toughest monsters and survive the worst storms. Without stress there would be none of that. The classic example is that we wouldn't have diamonds unless coal was squeezed so hard it changed form. Trite, but true. However you look at it, we won't get away from stress, and learning to deal with it is one of life's great trials. I wish you all the best in everything you do.

- M

Stepping off life's constant treadmill.

courtesy of Vladimir Zuñiga of Foca.tk

We have a saying around here about the "rat race." It basically is an analogy of how we humans race around so crazily, and that it may not be the best way to go about things. Most times people use the expression when they are tired and worn out and want to get away from the stress of usual living. "Take a vacation and get out of the rat race." We do like vivid sayings around here, and this is pretty poignant.

I do think the feeling is universal though. We all have times when we need a break, a vacation, a stress-free time where we can slow down and really enjoy life. There's certainly nothing wrong with that, and we probably should slow down much more than we do. Sit down, read a good book (have you checked out mine? hint-hint-nudge-nudge). There's a neat scene in the movie "Collateral" where the main character, a cab driver, stops and pulls down the sun visor. On the back of the sun visor is a post card of an idyllic Caribbean beach. He sighs, eats his lunch, and imagines himself owning a fleet of cabs and enjoying a better life. He calls it his "mini-vacation." It's a great idea.

Pacing is just as important in life as it is in a story. Too much action and you get overloaded. Too little and you're bored. But, spice it up now and again, then you find new life in the adventure and wings to fly higher. Living life to the fullest doesn't mean forgetting to slow down. I've seen too many people burn themselves out by pushing ever harder. Relax. It's not all today. Let tomorrow come on its own terms. Get out of the rat race now and again. Enjoy yourself.

- M

Knee surgery tomorrow

Any surgeries are frightening, especially ones where you are rendered fully unconscious and sleep through it all. I've had more than my share, including both knees totally replaced. The first knee replacement went great, the second not so much. Now, I go back in tomorrow to have a ton of scar tissue ripped out (well, sliced out in very careful sections, but it still feels brutal to me). I'm both excited for new mobility and terrified of what's being done to my body.

I can hardly comprehend how people must feel who go for heart surgery or brain surgeries. It's almost beyond understanding. The risk is so high, and yet we trust our surgeons to do their all to make us well. No wonder some doctors have a god complex. Myself, I'm not really worried. I've had this surgery four times before (orthoscopic knee surgery). But, I still am grateful my wife will be there with me--something like an adult security blanket I suppose.

Maybe the best thing one can do when facing surgeries is to think happy thoughts? Kind of like Peter Pan learning to fly. Think of puppy dogs and warm baths and sunsets lighting up the sky. And then enjoy the wonderful feeling of asking the anesthesiologist telling you to count back from 100 (seriously, I asked them to do that and I got to 98 once). The only thing I like is closing my eyes and immediately opening them again and finding it's all over ... like magic.

- M