Water gets a modern update ... with sparkles!

Water is necessary for your bodily health, tastes great, and is fun to throw at people. It's been around pretty much forever, and is now getting a modern update! Yup. Water with sparkles is the new fad. It's essentially classical soda water (water that's been carbonated, so it has bubbles) with some kind of flavoring. It tickles your nose and makes you burp. But, it's still the nourishing water you grew up with.

Don't get me wrong, I love this new water. I no longer need to seek out a soda pop when my stomach is feeling lousy, and can simply open a can of sparkling water. What I find amusing is how water first became a major industry (when many brands actually began with essentially tap water) and now has fashioned itself into a fad where you see water right next to the most popular soda pops. It's incredible. What an amazing world we live in.

So, how long until they repackage air? Or sunlight? What about making heat less unbearable? Is it possible to make vegetables more palatable to children? Perhaps someone could create a bread that toasts itself, or at least doesn't fall to pieces when you butter it. There's so many possibilities! Of course, you never can guess what the next fad will be, but I do hope this sparkling water idea sticks around for a long time.

- M

Why don't I like liver anymore? How can my tastes change so drastically?

When I was a kid, a neighbor would go deer hunting and cook up the most scrumptious and delectable liver I've ever eaten. To say I loved it would be to abuse the concept of love. It was glorious food. I would beg for it. In fact, when we moved to a new hometown, the first thing I wanted was a plate of liver. Erm, yuck. Sure, I realize cow and deer taste differently, but wow was it a shock. Whether it was the skill of the cook or the quality of the meat, I hated liver from then on.

Liver wasn't the only thing to fall to dislike. In fact, I've got a whole list of things I can't stand anymore. The question is, why? What makes my sense of taste such a fickle thing? At least I can understand if I'm sick and don't like something, but why will my taste buds scream foul at other times? Maybe there's some conspiracy theory about this? Hmm, perhaps.

The one which has really shocked me is my sudden distaste for milk chocolate. I've always been a chocoholic, but now I'm going toward dark chocolate or none at all. It's very odd. How can something so heavenly now be too sweet? I just don't understand my body. I am convinced that sometimes my brain just decides to be a jerk and see what mischief it can create inside my bones. Maybe I'm an evil genius and don't know it?

- M

Have a cookie, you'll feel a lot better.

Do you have a favorite treat that makes you feel all warm and loved? For me, it's cookies fresh from the oven and still hot. Sit me down with chocolate-chip cookies, pour a glass of milk, and I'll be a puddle of joy for the next half hour. Am I reliving my childhood? No, not really. What it actually reminds me of is a secure home, happy childhood, and wonderful family. Tastes and smells are powerful memory stimulators, also, food is a way of forming bonds and relationships.



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I think we enjoy giving loved ones something special, with the intent of making them feel how special they are to us. There's a cherished glory about these times--events which are beyond counting in importance. It's in these times when we demonstrate our best humanity. We give, without thought of reward or accolade. We offer something of ourselves, and the recipient becomes full of new life. If there is any magic in our world, this is where it lies. Giving, and expecting no return, is miraculous and we should encourage it as often as we think of it.

But, there's something really special about cookies. The word is fun to say, the ingredients are as varied as there are ideas, and they are so very good to eat! Plus, if you get them warm and soft, they simply melt in your mouth. Send them as gifts, treats, or bribes. Cookies are amazingly versatile. Oh, and I've heard that if you drink milk along with cookies, then they are calorie-free ...

- M

ps. Okay, I admit cookies aren't calorie-free, but it's a fun thing to say anyway.

Family meals are a true blessing.

Painting by Norman Rockwell

I think it's fair to say we all love food to a certain degree--hopefully in a healthy way. Growing up, my family always ate the evening meal together, at the dinner table. Our modern, chaotic, haphazard, and ridiculous schedules topple this concept much of the time. However, I still think it's important to gather at the table and eat. It's important. It's fun. It's worthwhile.

Why?

The main reason is so the family can get caught up on each other's lives. We need personal contact, and to ignore that reality is to the detriment of us all. We bond over food, and always have. Being together also encourages talking and getting to know each other. Sure, we hopefully enjoy good food, but it's the fellowship with loved ones that's primary in my mind.

Our lives are so busy, it's hard to find the time to get everyone all in one place. But, take the time and effort to do so. You'll quickly discover how treasured these moments become. I regret not spending more time with my children at the table. How is it we have all the time we need for silly activities, yet so little for the ones that truly matter? I'm not sure. What I do know is I hate regret, and leap at the opportunity to gather and talk and eat.

- M

Nerf guns and armor piercing tacos

If you've ever been a kid, you've probably been involved in a food fight at some point. It's a ritual of childhood, like climbing trees and mud pies. At some point Nerf guns came into the picture, offering the thrill of simulated battle and heroic last stands. My brother and I had huge wars in the basement, complete with little green plastic Army figures. Some years ago, I bought Nerf guns for the whole family and we enjoyed ambushing one another for weeks. It's really amazing how much variety there is now with foam weapons.

So, I'm wondering when food fights will catch up to the imbalance? I mean, there has to be someone dreaming up ideas for more effective thrown tomatoes and banana peals, right? Kids need the upgrade. I can only guess the impact on the human race, if food fights were shorter and more decisive. Yes, this could be the greatest achievement of the 21st century!

Sure, I'm not completely serious here. The world is too complicated to be solved with silliness. However, I'd love to see what might happen if we weren't so ugly and angry. Playing childish games won't make you a kid again, but it will make you laugh and giggle. There's no harm in that. Get out your best Nerf gun and have at it!

- M

Breakfast, the best way to wake up the morning!

Yes, this is actually toasted bread
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How did waking up become so complicated? Now, I'm racing around, finding the right socks, putting on deodorant, looking for my keys, and scrambling to stuff eggs down my throat. I'm told that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, but wow is it a busy one! I'm sure it'd be less hectic if I woke up earlier, set things out the previous night, and maybe hit the snooze button fewer times. Yup, that'll happen...

I've read that chefs have a special place in their heart for breakfast. Not sure if it's a good place or a bad place, but breakfast sure has a powerful bunch of different ways to do it. One day I'd love to try out the Eggs Benedict dish (I'm not terribly sophisticated), or maybe an Irish breakfast. I do enjoy eggs, so anything including them is a winner in my book. I hesitate to use the word, "exotic," because different cultures hardly think their own food is odd, but I am happy to try anything new at least once. I won't guarantee I will actually consume the items, though I will give it a hearty tasting.

 

Now, the best ever breakfast is the one served to you in bed. Yup, breakfast in bed. That is the bee's knees, the ultimate, the greatest experience ever. At least, until you spill your orange juice and feel it sloshing between your thighs. Amazing how sticky juice is, and how hard it is to convince your wife it was an accident and won't ever happen again. Maybe I should have used a tray. Hmm. Well, it's definitely a great gift to give you wife! Women love having their men cook for them (my relationship advice for today).

 

Remember, breakfast is important and don't you dare neglect it. A piece of buttered toast doesn't count...

 

- M

Food. What is it about food?

Why do we spend so much time, effort, and especially money, on food? Yes, taste rules supreme, but style and visual appeal also is expensive. French food is renown for being skimpy on quantity yet sensational to look at and savored. Food of that level is carefully prepared from the very best of materials, and using the very best culinary technicians. It's art you can eat. Still, why do we put so much effort into a basic body necessity? It's curious, don't you think?

 

I have a very limited sense of smell, and I've learned that much of the flavor of things is due to smell. Despite that issue, I still greatly enjoy food--a little too much actually. I only imagine what it must be like to fully savor exquisite French cuisine. And what if smells were entirely gone, would we still like food as much? I'm guessing yes.

 

Another thing funny to me is how foods don't change all that much. Sure, there are new combinations, but a steak is a steak now and was a steak centuries ago. I doubt salads will ever go away. And, what about candies? Chocolates? Those are an entire class of purely indulgent gastronomic marvels. We'll have soup forever, and breads, and everything else. Science fiction stories of the past had us thinking we'd be eating food cubes by this point. I am so very glad food never devolved. Happy eating.

 

- M

All things chocolate. Let us give thanks and rejoice!

Did you know today was National Dip Everything in Chocolate Day? And how dare you call yourself chocolatiers? I'm just kidding. Chocolate is one of those amazing feats of human engineering that dazzles and delights. I've seen some pretty amazing creations using nothing but chocolate. The creation of this treat is fairly simple, but there's a bewildering range and probably an infinite number of uses. It's sweet, rough, smooth, tart, delicate, and tough. All the same stuff ... chocolate!

 

Why do we like candy so much? Sure, it tastes good, but there's more to it I think. We love treating ourselves, and that goes in a big way to food. We eat to survive, but we also eat to relieve stress, share time with friends, and just because we want to--which is why I think we love candy. And, where there's demand there's supply. It's incredible to think people make their living creating and serving these snacks--not to mention entire industries.

 

We do love our comforts and entertainments. Sometimes I wonder if we do too much. I suppose it's only natural to want an easy life. It reminds me of the song from Fiddler on the Roof, "If I Were a Rich Man." Well, we may not have such a dream life, but we can certainly enjoy some fine chocolate. I personally prefer any with hazelnuts in it, especially the praline chocolate--like Nutella. Whatever your choice, remember, it's always better with chocolate. While your at it, try dipping anything in chocolate ... I'll bet it's better that way!

 

- M

A new grill! Let the barbeque feast begin!

I finally get to try out our new grill! Have I ever mentioned I love cooking on a grill? I particularly like charcoal, but I'm also fond of the ease of propane. So, this one is propane and I have quite a menu planned for this day. Hee hee, I'm already slobbering all over the keyboard. There's not anything nearly as good as food over an open flame, especially steak. Yum. ... I just wish I had enough teeth left to eat that, so I'll settle for chicken myself.

A grill powered by a Hemi engine! 250 hot dogs in 3 minutes!
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It really is funny how after all these centuries of human existence how we still cook over fancy campfires. And still roast marshmallows. And make an oopsie as we drop our meat in the fire. And forget to turn off the propane so we need a new tank. Maybe cooking with sticks isn't such a bad idea after all? Either way, I laugh how this simple method of cooking remains so common in our digital era. I'm still waiting for the magic ovens of Star Trek, or the plasma cookery I was promised through science fiction stories. Why is it every other part of modern life gets upgraded, but not the way we cook?

 

Back to my new grill, the sucker is huge. It's a gift from friends, and wow, they love us! We are truly dazzled by the present and are very grateful. I'm sure it'll get a lot of use, and it even has a full cover (so I won't be ruining another grill by leaving it out under the rain and snow ... whoops). So, I lift a pork chop toast to all the people cooking on grills today, and I hope you all enjoy full and satisfied stomachs.

 

- M

Crazy, ridiculously good jelly beans

I'd love to shake the hand of whoever invented the jelly bean. It's a perfect candy. Soft, but chewy. Candy shell, with a jelly filling. And, the varieties ... oh, the sweet variety of the jelly bean! I hear that you can get a Harry Potter style blend with ones that taste like vomit and ear wax (yeesh, not that I'm suggesting such a thing). Even more fantastic are the combinations that create bewildering flavors as they are eaten together--like popping two chocolate and a cake flavor that combine to make chocolate cake.

I know I've written about such things before, but it never fails to impress me at the imagination of we silly humans. And how we do throw our imagination into such frivolous goofiness! We never seem to tire of creating more and better and greater. I'm all for it. Who cares if such idle creativity doesn't last more than a few moments in the mouth? There are mushrooms that cost insane amounts of cash to purchase ... and those are for food that is gone in moments. But, the taste is exquisite!

When it comes down to it, we do many loony things just because they're pleasurable to do. I can think of worse reasons. I suppose all this effort could be funneled into other things much more productive. But, how much fun would that be? Surely there's plenty of room in life for a bit of play and frivolity? I'd like to think there is.

- M

Gummy Bears and candy, candy, candy.

One candy from my childhood has never faded with age: Gummy Bears. My favorite brand is Black Forest. Gummy Bears are such delightful little gelatin confections! Tough at first and chewy, but melt in your mouth. I loved them as a child, since I could buy them myself with very little money and now I still get them (I have a jar of them on my desk now). And there is even a ridiculous song about them: Gummy Bear Song.

It's amazing how little bits of candy can become such important parts of our lives. I think at our core, we humans prefer pleasure to work. That's maybe what candy is, a bit of pleasure that tickles our brains with untold delights. There's lots of types and many companies, or individuals, that make them (I personally enjoy making divinity candy) and so this love of candy continues on forever.

I sometimes wonder what the best kind of chocolate is (so far I think it's praline chocolate--not pralines, but hazelnut infused chocolate). Or what the best type of candy could be: is it mint meltaways, or vanilla divinity, or perhaps cotton candy? Well, at least life is full of lovely experiences and testing new things. Care to join me?

- M

Steak & Potatoes

Food is life, but if you must eat why not eat something really good? I suggest steak, a nice big ribeye or t-bone. Pick your cooking style--I prefer medium--and go to work. Add in potatoes and you've got a good 'ole American meal. Sadly I no longer have enough teeth to munch a steak, so I must reluctantly watch as my wife thoroughly enjoys said steak. Ah well, at least I can still enjoy the smell.

I am starting to understand why people become chefs. I mean, I'd love to eat creative meals (with nicely small portions) that taste fantastic. My new mantra is to eat less, but eat more flavor. After all, we all want to lose weight, so why not eat what tastes great? Most Americans go for quantity over quality, but it's far better to eat less and munch slower. Yup, I'm now giving dieting advice. Eat slower, eat less, and you'll enjoy what you have a lot more.

Perhaps I'll dig into some cookbooks and find a few recipes that I like. My main problem is the amount of time it takes to get everything ready, and the number of dirty dishes created. I can follow a recipe (I've even made Quiche Loraine) but it's not as quick and easy as television shows make it out. The good thing about learning to cook is that you'll never be truly hungry, because you can make a meal yourself (heh, learned that from Ratatouille).

- M

Hot chocolate is so much more than a nice drink...

My absolutely favorite drink of all time: Hot Chocolate!

Hot chocolate is a drink most of us have had as children when there's snow on the ground and we've just come back inside from playing in the cold. Cheeks half frozen, nose falling off, and eyebrows coated with ice, we tear off our gloves and drink a cup of pure Heaven. If our mother really loves us, she'll put little marshmallows in too. Somewhere in the process, magic happens. A childhood memory creeps into our brains and grabs hold for eternity.

 

It's pretty well understood that smells and tastes can trigger powerful recall of our past. Drinking hot chocolate is an especially good trigger (at least in my opinion), and takes us on a whirlwind tour of the happiest times in our lives. After all, how can anyone be sad with a cup of hot chocolate in their hands? I don't think it's possible. Actually, I believe any bad day will become a great day with a single sip of hot chocolate. It's magical stuff. Ambrosia--the drink of the gods; so good regular humans can't have it. But, we have it now. And like the fire Prometheus brought, once we have it, we aren't about to let it go again.

 

Okay, silliness aside, I am so grateful to the inventors of hot chocolate. Other cultures have different versions, such as a little shot glass of sipping chocolate--a wonderfully thick version that isn't drunk in gulps, but sipped delicately and savored. More varieties abound, and I couldn't possibly list all the styles available. Here's a travel idea: go to places based on their different styles of hot chocolate; enjoy your world hopping!

 

Just a moment... mmmmm... ah, the sweet memories.

 

- M

Cotton Candy Days.

Ever read a book that takes you back to your childhood? Or seen a movie that captures a moment so perfectly that you can't help but be drawn inside? Perhaps it's music that speaks to your soul and brings tears to your eyes...

 

 

 

Or, maybe it's sitting on a blanket with your children, watching clouds pass as you eat cotton candy?

 

Moments like that make life worth living. They really do. I've spent countless hours watching clouds, imagining them forming fun shapes, and talking. Many of my fondest memories are spending time with my wife (well, girlfriend then) looking at clouds and talking. Talking about important things. Talking about silly things. Talking about dreams. Talking about hopes. Talking about the past, and the future. We became close because we talked.

 

It's amazing how fast memories such as those brings goose bumps across my arms! And when I experience a story that does the same thing, I quiver with happiness. As I grow older, I search for times that recall simpler moments, without the stress of adult life. Of course, it's different for everyone but the effect is no less.

 

Cotton Candy Days... those blissful times when all you cared about was that glorious sugar confection which melts in your mouth.

 

- M

Pie. I like it.

I like pie. All pie. Every kind and color.

Well, maybe not the color of soot. And, actually, I don't like pumpkin all that much. Come to think of it, I really only eat apple pie or French silk pie. Well, just goes to show you that making blanket statements isn't a great idea much of the time, or any time for that matter. The point is, be careful what you say. Words matter. Ideas matter even more. Communicating those ideas in meaningful ways makes us special.

The funny thing about all this is, I really do like pie. I do my level best to try any new thing I'm given, and I've made my kids promise to at least try something once and then judge it. The truth is, sometimes it's really tough--I can only imagine how I'd respond if someone put a plate of snails in front of me. Yeesh. The thought is a bit up there for me. Here, have a look...it's called "escargot"...

Doesn't look all that bad really. I'll put it on my list of things to try.

Anyway, enjoy life today. Make the best out of what you've been given and give your all. Life is worth it. And, if you get the opportunity, have a nice thick slice of your favorite pie!

- M

Your One Final Meal

 

If, for whatever reason, you were forced to pick your final meal... what would it be? I have no idea how someone could decide. Would you pick a ham and cheese sandwich? Or McDonalds? I really doubt it. Probably the finer things may pop to mind, like a nice t-bone steak, or some caviar, or sparkling grape juice. Things you haven't tried before, were too poor to try, or simply never gave in to the temptation to try.

The other tactic would be to order whatever your favorite meal actually is, like steak and potatoes, or a nice charbroiled chicken, and maybe a nice pie. I like pie. Chocolate silk pie. Yummy. I think I'd choose Spaghetti Pie. Yup, that really is a meal, check it out.

I find it really interesting that despite our human need for food, and so many recipes created and passed on, that our stories have very little to say about what the characters within them eat. I think it's probably mainly because unless you're the one eating, it doesn't really have much of interest. I've read plenty of books that describe all sorts of meals, and I've generally found it boring. At times it's neat, such as when people are surviving on grubs and worms (ick) because I have no idea how to actually live that way and so it's interesting.

So, if you were forced to pick, what would it be? Maybe the better question is why?

- M