Fear is a great motivator.

I doubt anybody enjoys being afraid. I'm not talking about spooky stories that give you shivers, but true and stark terror. Being in combat is one example. Finding yourself inside a burning house is another. Adrenalin surges through your system, your hands shake, time slows down, everything becomes very sharp and stark. When you're truly afraid, you search out any possibility to make yourself safe, regardless of how crazy the ideas are. Fear is a fantastic motivator.

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Some professions require people to walk the realm of fear on a daily basis, to charge into the teeth of death itself and not look back. Bravery barely touches the inner fortitude of such men and women. One aspect of heroic stories that I always find fascinating is how the hero finds their bravery. Is it learned, born, forced? Is it like leadership? Perhaps an innate talent or gift?

Perhaps our awe of bravery is tied with our fear of the unknown. I do think it's true that most people idolize extreme bravery, yet also hope they themselves never need to perform such acts. Beating fear is a constant goal, and a good one to be sure, because we human beings hate limitations. We don't like being stopped by our own weakness, so we push at the barrier of fear throughout our lives. Sure, it's good to be afraid of a charging lion or twisting tornadoes, but there are instances where those fears must be faced and overcome. Life isn't safe and never will be, so let your fears motivate you to greater heights.

- M

Love is incredible.

Image by: Amanda

I am married and my wife has given me three incredible children. I was thinking about love, and thought back on parenting advice I've often heard: "Don't have a favorite child." I was confounded by the concept. It didn't seem possible. Yet, as a father, I can honestly say my love is total for each of my children. My heart isn't split four ways. It's full. I love them all completely, unequivocally, and without condition. You see, love is like that. You can love all of your children with your whole heart. If you are blessed with another child, your heart will embrace the gift absolutely and won't break. It's a miracle of life.

I'll never forget the births of my children. My wife and I happily counted the days until the expected time, then struggled through the process, and finally a fresh life entered the wide world. I can't imagine another time when such overwhelming love will wrap around me. Breathtaking. The yearning and joy and hope which infuses a crying and wriggling little baby is mind boggling. Yet, no matter how many are added, your heart happily adds another without missing a beat. There is never-ending room inside the wellspring of love. What an incredible gift love is!

Maybe this is why we value love so highly? True love is cherished and treasured, while betrayal of that love is hated and despised. It's a sign of something greater in our lives, and we yearn for it. Greek tragedies often center around the single concept of lost love, and modern romances are practically dripping with it. Love crosses all barriers, brings us closer, and binds us in ways too deep to express.

I have an answer to an old riddle: "What do you give the person who has everything?"

Give them love.

- M

Tribute to fathers

We all have fathers to thank for our lives. It's tragic that not everyone has a father around them, due to myriad circumstances. Fathers teach us so much about men and what it means to grow up. They provide the boundaries and discipline we require to mature. In the ideal, fathers are intimately connected in our lives, are always available and caring. Sure, fathers aren't perfect, nobody is, but their influence on our lives is enormous and lasting.

I think back on my childhood and my father is always a big part. He's my personal hero. I hope one day to be the man he is. Whenever I'm facing a huge decision, I want to know what he thinks. His advice is worth the effort, and there is nobody I want to impress more than him. Being a father myself, I keenly feel the responsibility and pressure to be the best I can be. It's not easy, simple, or applauded for the most part, but the reward is massive.

Amusingly, I promised myself that I wouldn't be the sort of dad who would do long speeches about stuff ... well, my kids have made it clear I've become well known for my speeches. Ah well. My reason is simply to instruct, and sometimes it takes a bit of time to express such things. Apparently dads are like that, so who am I to break tradition now? My deepest hope is to raise children with respect, compassion, and the strength to deal with life. That's what Father's Day means to me.

Happy Father's Day!

- M

Lessons from my brother

My brother, the pilot

My brother is a pilot. The enormity of that statement is pretty incredible, since I can't think of a single time in my life when he wanted to be anything else. He was a military pilot first and has now moved into commercial piloting. I have no doubt he is in the top echelon of ability (as he proved so well in the military that he became an instructor pilot and did the check rides of all the base officers). But, watching him reach and grasp his dream isn't all of what he taught me.

Despite all our arguing, fights, antagonizing, pestering, chiding, bullying, yelling and generally acting like siblings, my brother taught me the importance of many things. He demonstrated a vast love of reading (though he is a speed reader and I cherish every word), gave me the ability to analyze situations for possible gains, instilled a deep yearning for protecting those I care about, showed me that two people working together are far better at making things happen than a single person alone, and probably the most important of all: that brothers stick together forever.

I regret the times I haven't felt this way. Yes, as a child we were cruel to each other, as siblings often are, but I'm more mature now and I have set those memories aside. I love my brother. Because of him, I know there is always a man I can turn to for help and support. We don't talk as much as I'd like, though we nearly always find something to laugh about when we do. Life just wouldn't be the same without him.

For those of you with brothers and sisters, I pray you will cherish them with all your being. Life is uncertain and often tragic. What a shame it would be to lose them, with thoughts unsaid or love unexpressed. Poetically speaking, your family shares your heartbeat and feel your pains and triumphs in equal measure. Let them know.

- M

I despise endings and goodbyes

Have you ever gotten to the end of a book and immediately looked for the next part? If you love a story, then you don't want it to end. You want to see more of the world, hear the next adventure of the heroes, or simply want to hang out with them some more. It's awful to reach the end and know there's nothing more. I well remember when "Return of the Jedi" ended, I was satisfied and torn and wanted to keep experiencing the Star Wars universe. Because of that, I read many of the novels and comics that came out, simply to extend my time in their world. Love is like that.

The final part of a story is typically called the anti-climax--because it's the bit immediately following the exciting climax--and is where plot threads get wrapped up and characters are set free to go on their way. Mostly these segments are short and to the point, to lessen the pain of saying goodbye. There are types of stories that never fully say goodbye (any series with a recurring character is a good example). I think this may be the reason for the incredible surge of long-running movie franchises. I can't imagine any other reason why we've seen the continuing success of the Marvel movies (aside from having some really fun stories).

Audiences enjoy falling in love with characters who last more than a single story, who can influence their worlds, and who matter for the long term. My first love is certainly the hobbits from the Lord of the Rings books, particularly Sam and Frodo. It's refreshing to see a greater acceptance for extended stories, even ones that last for over 10 years (such as the Marvel movies). Maybe this means that people's attention spans are finally growing? I hope so.

- M

Remembering the fallen

Today is the anniversary of the Normandy invasion, the largest amphibious assault in world history. The heroes who died that day saved the world from tyranny and untold darkness. I've seen documentaries, read biographies, and listened to testimonies of that day and it never fails to make the hairs on my neck stand up. Today was filled with heroics I cannot fathom, terror I hope I never understand, hope and vision and stubbornness and pain. I thank God for their sacrifice, and I pray it is always remembered. Today, we thank our fallen heroes.

We remember Normandy

D-Day, Omaha beach

- M

The blindness of spectacle

A trend in many modern stories is for spectacle. What I mean is it's not the story as a whole that's the big draw, but certain portions and even little set pieces. Movies are of particular note, since everything is visual enticement. Movie previews love to show "money shots" where something impressive is happening, but these spectacles don't make a story--frequently they totally detract from the plot, in the vain search for heightened emotions. The problem is that spectacle can blind the audience to the otherwise lack of depth in the story. Sure, an audience is dazzled by what's happening, but when they reflect on their experience they'll discover a profound lack of substance. That's the danger.

Stories are a series of events strung together in meaningful ways. Memorable scenes are touchstones for a good story, but shouldn't be based upon them. Stich them together and let the audience decide what should be the spectacles. Of course, it's hard not to make a spectacle out of something like the Battle of Helms Deep (Lord of the Rings), or the sinking of the Titanic, or the sunset of twin suns in Star Wars. It's magical when these things happen naturally and I'm dazzled by authors who manage the trick.

My favorite stories roll along like unstoppable juggernauts, where the heroes are barely keeping up and the villain is pulling all the strings. Well, the other way around is fun too, I fully admit. All that really matters is having a good time and being entertained. We search out stories to step away from life for a little while. It's escapism. So, like beauty, a story is in the eye of the beholder. If it works, then who cares if it follows the rules.

- M