Crying wolf -- or, seeking attention

"The Boy Who Cried Wolf"

 

There's a story many parents tell their children, typically called, "The Boy Who Cried Wolf." (It's an Aesop's Fable actually) It's about a little boy who's watching a flock of sheep and thinks it's funny to yell out that there's a wolf, so the whole village rushes up to fight a wolf ... except, the boy was playing a joke and there's no wolf. Angry, the villagers go back home. Well, the boy does it again, and laughs at the upset villagers. Finally, a wolf does show up and the boy screams that there's a wolf, but this time the villagers ignore his calls because they don't want to be made fools again. So, the wolf eats the whole flock of sheep. You see, had the boy not tricked the villagers then they would have believed his sincere cry for help. Moral of the lesson: cry for help too much and when you really need it nobody will listen.

 

Children aren't the only ones guilty of this behavior, because adults do it all the time. It's sometimes called "attention seeking behavior." I'm not sure that's entirely fair though. We can get used to too much help, to the point where we don't like doing anything alone. But, it's probably fair to say adults know better and still do it. I will say this, it's really irritating to the people helping. People like to help, they really do, but don't test their generosity too far and you'll quickly find out how true the story of the boy and the wolf really is.

 

Given all that, when should we ask for help? When we are at the end of all our options, our fingers worked to the bone, and we can't see any other way out? No. Ask for help whenever you actually need it. Don't fear asking for help. If you need it, then ask. And, be grateful for the help. Most people are glad to help when asked kindly. Who knows where it might lead? You may even find a friend for life.

 

- M

End of the year review

So, how did you do this year?
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At the beginning of the year, we make resolutions about what we'll accomplish and so on. But, do we sit down at the end of the year and figure out if we actually did anything on our list? Nope. I'm just as guilty of this as anyone. I think it's kind of depressing to see how optimistic we are at the start of the year, just to be slapped in the face by reality at the end. So, it's easier to ignore it all and go on my merry way.

 

Of course, this begs the question of why we make resolutions in the first place? I doubt we make them in spite of ourselves, since I believe we really do mean to get things done, yet we also are somewhat aware that we are probably kidding ourselves. We pledge to lose weight, become wealthy, inspire the world, and bring peace to everyone. There are all kinds of promises we make. The most important ones are the ones we have control over, and still life gets in the way and we find ourselves failing to meet our own expectations.

 

So, am I suggesting that we stop making promises to ourselves? Nope, not at all. I think we need the optimism in our lives. We need to be reaching for better, and striving for more than who we are currently. We realize that self-improvement is something we should do, so we make resolutions to make that happen. So what if we don't accomplish them all? At least we tried. It's better to try and fail than fail to try. Hmm, that's pretty good ... I wonder if anyone said that before?

 

- M

Merry Christmas!

May we all remember the reason for the season. And, may peace be with you.

 

Merry Christmas!

 

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Fun in the snow

Like many children, I remember making snow angels, snowball fights (not with icy snow though, that's mean), snow caves, snow forts, and simply diving into snow drifts. I lived where there was lots of snow and sorely miss it these days. My children did get an opportunity to experience a genuine white-out blizzard though--and I made sure they got out in it and remembered the experience. I think snow is beautiful and inspiring. It's pure magic for a kid.

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Of course, as you grow older, you find yourself driving in the snow and it's a lot less enjoyable. Well, many people think so, but I'm not one of them. I love driving in snow and ice, and have gotten pretty good at it. Deep snow isn't fun to walk through and it sure isn't fun to scoop out a driveway full of the stuff. But, it's all worthwhile when you look out your back windows and see a lawn of shining snow. Trees and shrubs look astounding with a nice coat of snow and ice. Something deep inside us marvels at simple beauty and we shouldn't turn aside when we experience it.

 

I talk a lot about recapturing the joys of childhood because we adults forget too easily. There's nothing wrong with sitting down and watching anthills, or listening to thunderstorms, or marveling at a shooting star. We lose the wonder, the joy, the thrill of discovery, and delirious fun of being alive. So, find some snow and jump in. Flail your arms, make a snow angel, and don't mind that you're getting wet. Have some fun!

 

- M

Human autopilot

There are times when we do things automatically, without thinking about what we're doing. Habit sometimes shows up that way. I've heard of people moving to a new house and when they drive home they find themselves at their old home. It's done without thought. I bet we've all done something similar. Habit can be an exceptionally tough thing to break.

 

Some skills are actually exercises in automatic behavior--for instance: assembly line work, typing, public speaking, billiards, juggling, and on to an infinite variety. Right now, I'm dazzled by piano players and the way their hands work independently of each other to create incredible music. I'm learning to play and am pleasantly surprised to find out it's very similar to typing--which I'm great at. Drumming is another skill that bewilders me, because good drummers can keep multiple beats going without flaw while still twisting in flairs and surprises--it's like their arms are alien creatures with life all their own.

 

Of course, going on automatic pilot can cause problems. There are times we totally drift away, daydreaming while our bodies do their own thing. You can easily drop out and find yourself an hour down the road and not remember any of it. That can be dangerous, so consider that a friendly warning. And then there's my personal favorite automatic activity ... daydreaming! Yup, I've lost dozens of hours happily floating along on my own imagination. I highly recommend it.

 

- M

Star Wars-Rogue One movie review (no spoilers here)

 

My son and I went to see the new Star Wars movie, "Rogue One." I love Star Wars, particularly the original trilogy. This movie, if you didn't know, is about how the rebels get the plans for the Death Star (the planet busing movie from the original Star Wars--now known as "Episode IV, A New Hope"). This movie nicely slots in right before it, providing a welcome new world to rampage around in. "Rogue One" is loads of fun! I loved it.

 

I'm sure some people will look for, and find, plot problems and nitpicks. But, the movie focuses on story and creates deeply provoking characters. Yes, there are call outs to well-known characters (mainly simple cameos), but this movie is all about new people. The actors clearly were having a good time and there's plenty of chemistry between them. This is a story about courage and sacrifice for the greater good. I'm all for more stories like it.

 

"Rogue One" breaks Star Wars tradition in a lot of ways, but the most surprising was that it doesn't feature a title crawl spelling out the story. Yippee! We dive straight in to the action. We are with the main character the entire movie, and get to know her hopes and pains very well. Darth Vader is back in his true role--the big and nasty muscle of the Empire--though I'm not quite sure what to think of him. As we have time to process, I hope to find people like the portrayal.

 

The movie ends as it must. However, if you think you know what happens because you know Princess Leia has the Death Star plans at the end ... well, you've watched Star Wars before. This movie is about how it happens, and it's a terrific ride. I'm glad that piece was added to the puzzle. It's a good story that deserved to be told. I can't give a better compliment as a writer.

 

- M

Sharing is caring ... but, but, but it's mine!

One of the first lessons we learn as kids is to share. I admit it's a bit of a strange concept, even for adults. We work hard to earn something and then are expected to share it without recompense? But, it's mine! Yeah, tough thing to do. Despite the fact that much of our lives is given willingly and openly. For some reason, sharing our toys is almost going too far.

 

There's a scene in the recent movie, "Guardians of the Galaxy" where the main hero--StarLord--has finally recovered his music device (a Sony Walkman cassette tape player), which is his only link to his dead mother. Another hero asks why it was so important, and StarLord hands over the device without a second thought or worry. It's immensely valuable to him, and he has no problem sharing it. Wow, that's a surprising example to see. The last time I did that, I got my book back with water damage--grrrr.

 

Possession is a funny concept actually. Who is doing the possessing? When we have trouble sharing, then I think there's a good argument toward either side being the possessor. We have a word for people who don't share--selfish. Sure, it's used in a harmful way at times, but for the most part we understand the need to share what we have. If we hold onto things too tightly, they rule our lives and we are no longer free. By sharing we actually free ourselves from a sort of prison. It's a neat concept, and we know it's so valuable that we teach our children from the beginning about it.

 

Who could have guessed parents were so smart? Amazing!

 

- M

Spending time with your honey.

Sorry about the late blog post, but yesterday I spent all evening watching movies with my sweetheart and I wasn't about to interrupt that time for anything. In our busy world, it's far too easy to let time slip away and not spend it with the people who matter most in your life. We go to work, do our jobs, then come home and growl at anyone around and then go to sleep (well, maybe that's just me ... on a bad day). Hopefully I've learned to do better.

 

No matter if it's a formal date, a spontaneous outing, or simple time alone, being with your special lady (or man) is worth a thousand regular days. I personally enjoy a good mix of planned and unplanned. However you manage it, you'll build memories to last a lifetime. Such connections are impossible to replace, yet are built with tiny strands of shimmering moments. It's a delicate and fragile process, easy to interrupt and hard to produce.

 

 

Let our your hopelessly romantic side and really treat your loved ones with special attention. Turn off your cell phone, put aside your tablet, switch off the television and spend time together. It doesn't have to cost a nickel and I bet you'll enjoy it too. It's actually a funny thing how we need reminding to do what we already want to do.

 

Well, what are you waiting for? Go spend time with your beloved!

 

- M

Ideas come from ... well, it's magic.

A cast of an anthill. Wow!

Have you ever asked an artist where they get their ideas? Likely a comedian will tell you it's from life. An artist might say their dreams. A musician perhaps will mention a particularly emotional time. A writer will smile and say, yes. You see, it's all of these things and more. Creative people are constantly sifting through their experiences and holding onto little nuggets they find interesting. It's like a little boy picking through stones at the side of a road. There are jewels to find, even if nobody else sees them. Imagination doesn't get bogged down by specifics or practicality. When something is fascinating, that's all it needs to be.

 

In Greek times they called inspiration a gift of the gods (specifically the Muses) and felt it was supernaturally gifted. I'll agree it sure feels like that when inspiration pounds you flat with awe, though most times it's a willful act of searching for something you like. Think of listening to music. Do you always listen to the same thing? If you have a large music library, you probably skip through quite a few until you settle down and let it play. Ideas are like that.

 

My favorite answer is to say I get ideas from clouds and then walk away. Best to give somebody a thing to ponder rather than shrug and say, "No clue. Why? Do you have an idea for me?"

 

What's the real issue is what you do with an idea. Is it worthy of putting effort into it, or is it only a puff of wind on your cheek? What could blossom from your work? And, if successful, how many people will be delighted? Ideas don't even have to be grand and profitable. Try out a few that have no more impact than a paper airplane gliding to the end of your living room. Ideas are magic, and so are you.

 

- M

Remembering the costs of freedom

December 7th is an introspective date here in America. We look back on when our country was attacked without provocation or declaration of war. A sneak attack. Many people died that day and drew our nation into another great war. It's a day to honor veterans, think about current state of affairs, and pray for our military.

 

It's been said that peace comes at the point of a sword. I pray and hope it doesn't come to that again. War is unkind to all involved. May we remember and pledge our strength to peace.

 

In honor of those fallen.

We remember Pearl Harbor.

USS Arizona memorial

Massive animals are fun

As a boy, I loved dinosaurs--as most boys tend to. What's not to love? Huge creatures. Terribly scary. Ancient. Extinct. Plus, all we have is bones (and a few rock impressions of bodies) to tell us what these things looked like. So, it gave me free reign to create dinosaurs my own way. I made them gigantic. The only trouble was, it's difficult to really imagine the scale of such animals. Sure, it's simple to think of a great building and picture that. But, when was the last time you saw a building walk?

 

A couple of recent movies depicted enormous creatures--Godzilla and Pacific Rim. But, it's like looking at pictures in a book. There's so little sense of true scale. A favorite game of mine (EVE Online) has ships so huge they'd make the Death Star look puny. In the game, players progress from tiny vessels with a single occupant into ships with millions. Yet, regardless of the increasing scale, the size visually is the same (a game design decision, otherwise how could you possibly see what's going on if the ship is your entire world?). This is one area that 3-D visualization is well suited to illustrate. Without a sense of depth, it's just an image.

Kong: Skull Island
an upcoming movie about a really big ape

There are times when the scale really comes into focus. There's a game, Shadow of the Colossus, where you fight monsters so huge that you climb on them (and the final boss is practically city-sized). Maybe it's because you interact closely with these colossi, but the scale feels incredibly real. When the magic of perspective is fully revealed, it grants breathtaking vision. And, when you witness giant monsters wandering around, there's a special joy that isn't matched by anything smaller.

 

- M

The incredible heights of joy

Joy is often times an overwhelming emotion. People will cry and howl and fall to their knees due to incredible joy. Joyful relief is especially strong, as it's a catharsis for bottled-up emotions. I've noticed that within the bounds of a story, true joy is particularly difficult to create. I think back on my youth and the scene from the original Star Wars, where Luke destroys the Death Star. The entire story builds up to it, and I was very happy for the characters. Yet, my joy was in seeing the bad guys lose and the good guys come together in victory. Yes, overwhelming joy. Had I been in theaters at the time, I'm sure they were whooping and hollering and clapping each other on the backs.

 

In life, we can easily get caught up in finding joy over any other thing. People waste vast fortunes in pursuit of pleasure, others spend huge chunks of time doing things that only provide joy for a moment before blowing away. Because of this, stories provide a great opportunity to seek joy in a safe environment--after all, the story won't come through the pages and slap you for getting it wrong will it? One of my favorite joyful moments comes from the Heinlein book, "Have Spacesuit, Will Travel." When the hero of the story (a boy who fixed up a used spacesuit and goes on adventures) finally gains his courage and fights to succeed, I was practically dancing in my room. I loved that moment, and actually closed the book to treasure it--I finished the book the next day.

 

Our emotions do define us, just as much as our logic defines us. They can't be removed without tearing apart who we are. It's why we love roller coasters, complicated puzzles, romances, and mysteries. We thrill at having our emotions jostled and sprung. Stories are emotional hurricanes. The funny thing is, we know what we're getting into with a story, because there's always a tease about what the story is about.

 

Joy is the emotion we likely crave the most. We want a happy ending. We want to feel good afterwards. We hope everything turns out, and when it does we still find ourselves elated. Treat yourself to a good story, and find a bit of joy today!

 

- M

Wisdom teeth ... makes wise?

I've been told that wisdom teeth are so named because it shows the person is now old enough to be wise. Erm, no. For me, I'm blessed with a small mouth and giant teeth, so I had mine taken out pretty early. I've heard that some people manage to keep them and are then apparently quite wise. Should the story include a penalty for having the wisdom teeth pulled out? Hmm, that would make for a better urban legend, I think.

 

Trouble is, getting teeth pulled hurts. A lot. And, getting four monster molars pulled at the same time is a prescription for agony. We all have ways of dealing with pain, but pain in your mouth is one of the worst kinds. You can't get away from it. It's not like you can stop moving your jaw for long periods. My trouble is that my tongue seems to have a life of its own, and the silly thing keeps probing at places it shouldn't. Result? Ouch.

 

Maybe wisdom teeth do make you wise after all? You learn quite a lot about pain and managing discomfort. Those are definitely worthwhile lessons. And, life serves up quite a few painful teaching moments, that's for sure. I just wish we didn't have to go through the pains first. But, I'd bet we wouldn't learn anything if it didn't hurt when we did wrong. There's another life lesson.

 

Wow, wisdom teeth do make you smerter!

 

- M