I've recently discovered that there are no allergies in the middle of the ocean! Woohoo! I'm moving there tomorrow. My plan is to float on a city-sized raft and enjoy blissful breathing without any stuffiness or grogginess. I haven't figured out all the details yet, but the plan seems solid and workable. I am a bit concerned about being run over by cargo ships and cruise liners, but they have radar and will avoid my awesome raft city.
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| See? Even dogs love salt water! |
Apparently this is all made super convenient by the presence of so much salt. Sinus cavities are cleaned out by salty air, and salt is good for your skin as well (that's why people go to the Dead Sea and have a good soak in the water). Also, salt water makes floating on your back extremely easy--to the point where going for a dive is very difficult. Of course, I could also be some sort of mutant balloon-like human who's natural habitat is meant to be airborne? [note: That's fine with me by the way]
My wife understands now--especially now that she's had a chance to swim in the ocean. She'll probably love floating on the raft, without anything to do but stitch and quilt and loaf around. I'll become a tough and tanned survival man, ready to take on the world with my bare hands! I bet I'd be able to punch a shark and make it my best buddy (I'll call it Ralph).
Just think: all this from salt water! What a deal!
- M
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