When I was a child, there was a saying I heard often, "If you want a friend, be a friend." The idea being that friendship starts with being friendly in the first place. It puts the onus on myself and not others. I need to initiate. Of course, if everyone is doing the same thing then it's easy to make friends. These days I see far too many people with scowls on their faces, clearly not interested in talking with anyone, and it's rather difficult to engage a sour attitude with friendliness. I still try though.
The glory of friends is you have someone to talk to who has expressed interest in you and hopefully wants to help you succeed in life. Moving to close friends and there you have someone actively wanting to help and who will be there for you in times of difficulty. Friends make life more rewarding. Personally, I have only a few close friends, though many general friends, because it's kind of hard to fully open up to anyone. Close friends know who you really are and still accept you.
To anyone struggling to make friends, I offer encouragement. Keep trying. Being friendly is a skill, and like any skill there are some who do it naturally and others who learn it through sheer hard work. You'll find someone, in this wide and wonderful world. Even total goofballs make friends. Cheer up, smile, and get out there. Don't give up, keep trying, and open your eyes. Sometimes all it takes is a happy face finding the eyes of a tormented soul, and if you let it, then a fast friendship can blossom.
- M
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